A Love Worth Fighting For
by Miki55
Summary: For Mihashi, life with his new team was more than he could ever hope for. But what if Team Mihoshi's apologies were forced and untrue, and a certain character still wanted revenge? Abe and Mihashi will be pushed to their limits. Abe/Mihashi
1. Chapter 1

Abe x Mihashi

Disclaimer: I do not own any characters from Ookiku Furikabute.

Warning: This story will eventually be slash. If you do not like male/male pairings, do not read this story.

This story is going to be a main AbexMihashi with side relationships with Tajima and Hanai cause I love them both too.

This story is consuming be though it seems like I've been working on this first chapter for forever. Please enjoy.

A Love Worth Fighting For

Chapter One- Old Acquaintances

"Ok boys, let's wrap it up and turn in for the night!" Momoe's loud voice carried from the dugout all the way back to the team, who was practicing in the outfield.

The sound of the team's footsteps were muted by the cicadas, who were buzzing loudly in the near by trees. The early afternoon rain had chilled the earth but had also made the field slick with mud. The team had tried as much as possible not to step on the soft dirt of their diamond, in fear of leaving crater footprints that would need to be filled up the next day, but some times it was inevitable. Run away balls or a slip of the mitt would send a baseball rolling innocently to the pitchers mound and the retriever always returned covered with mud. Though practice was more vigorous than usual, Team Nishiura knew that in order to win their next game, they had to be in prime condition. They had already beat Mihoshi, but the summer tournament was only a couple weeks away.

"You were awesome today, Tajima!" Sakaeguchi remarked as the team entered the school locker room.

Tajima grinned widely as he pealed off his soaked undershirt. "Yeah, I was totally in the zone today." Those around him started laughing and patting him on the back. Mihashi, however, stood in the corner, his locker door open in hopes of concealing himself as much as possible. His wet clothes were making his thin body shiver as tiny goosebumps multiplied on his arms and legs.

"Hey, you need to change before you catch a cold," Abe ordered, walking over to Mihashi after watching the shorter boy stare blankly at his open locker for several minutes. The last thing he needed was for his pitcher to get sick. At the sound of his voice, Mihashi jumped and started stuttering, looking in Abe's direction, but his eyes landed anywhere but his face. Abe internally groaned. He hated when Mihashi got like this. The boy was so unpredictable, and his little quirks covered up his true feelings, making it even harder for Abe to find out the true reason behind Mihashi's actions. "Just hurry up and change, alright?"

Mihashi nodded slowly before glancing down at the floor, his hair covering up his eyes. Something was wrong. Mihashi's shoulders shook slightly as he took a small step backwards. Though any other person on the team might brush off those mannerisms as insignificant, Abe knew Mihashi. Mihashi was being defensive, and Abe wanted to know why.

"What is it? What's wrong?" Abe asked, sounding harsher than he actually felt.

Mihashi shook his head. Practice today had been tough. Abe had tried to teach him how to throw a forkball, but because Mihashi was a naturally good thrower and so used to learning things on his own, he found Abe's instructions confusing and difficult. He could tell Abe was getting frustrated with him. About halfway through practice, Abe had snapped at him about speed and control. Even though Mihashi knew that he was only trying to help, he still took the remark personally. He knew he didn't deserve Abe as his catcher. Without Abe there to tell him which balls to throw, Mihashi was just another unknown, untalented baseball player. His pitches were slow, even if he did have some control, and though he practiced a lot, learning new pitches was very difficult for him. Mihashi knew that it was only a matter of time before Abe saw these flaws in him and decided to move on to Hanai or Oki. Mihashi stared at the ground, hoping that Abe would just leave him alone so he could finish changing.

Abe continued to study Mihashi, even though the smaller boy had not answered him. He could tell that a million different thoughts were running through Mihashi's head by the way his shoulders tensed up and his hands were clenched and glued to his sides. Abe couldn't understand what was wrong. Sure, practice hadn't gone exactly the way he had planned and learning the forkball was proving to be quite difficult, but he could already see Mihashi improving and he knew the pitcher would work hard until he got it right. It was one of the many qualities he admired in Mihashi. Plus, the forkball was a very hard pitch to learn. He didn't hold any resentment to the fact that Mihashi had failed to master the throw the first time practicing with it.

Without thinking, Abe grasped Mihashi's shoulder, intending on lecturing the boy about opening up to each other and learning to be each other's battery. But when his hand touched the damp clothing, he could feel Mihashi's cold body shivering. Exasperated, Abe shook his head.

"Just, hurry up and change, will you?" Abe turned and walked back to his own locker, intending on picking up his backpack and leaving. He had a biology test that he had to study for the next day, not to mention all the other homework his teachers had piled on.

"S-s-sorry…" Mihashi's small voice was barely heard over the rambunctious noise in the background, but Abe caught it. Mihashi voicing out his feelings was a start at least.

Abe turned back around and smiled. He could tell each day that Mihashi was willing to open himself up more and more to him, and Abe was glad that he was being trusted. It would make their battery relationship even stronger. Mihashi was still not looking at him, but that was okay.

"Don't worry about the forkball. We'll work on it more tomorrow. Just go home and get some rest," Abe said gently.

Mihashi's face snapped up to stare at Abe in shock. He had been so sure that Abe was going to yell at him for being so stupid and slow, then tell him to step down from the mound and leave. That's how it was at Mihoshi, so why should it be any different here? Yet, there was Abe, telling him not to worry about it. Mihashi felt a shy smile tug at the corner of his lips, but he quickly turned away and began unbuttoning his uniform shirt.

"O-okay. Bye, Abe-kun," Mihashi quietly mumbled, his cold numb fingers finding it difficult to undo the stiff buttons.

"Goodbye, Ace," Abe said, walking out the door.

Once Abe left, Mihashi finished changing in a daze. He still couldn't grasp just how accepting his new teammates were. Abe's last comment left his face uncomfortably red. His team told him that he pitched well, but Mihashi couldn't help but fear that when he least expected it, they would turn on him. When he was with Mihoshi…

"No!" Mihashi screamed inside his head, trying to suppress a shudder. He wanted to move past those horrible times. Even now, his past teammates haunted his life. Mihashi promised himself that they were gone. Besides, they had said they were sorry for the way they had treated him. He needed to let his past go and move on. He liked his new team. They treated him like a true pitcher, an ace. Mihashi didn't want to do anything stupid to mess that up.

Mihashi finished changing quickly, and grabbed his school bag. After saying a quick goodbye to the rest of his team, he unlocked his bike and began the ride home. Mihashi's blue bicycle sprayed up a stream of water from the back tire as he made his way down the vacant sidewalk. Night was fast approaching as the sun dropped lower to the horizon. The cool night air blew against Mihashi's face, instantly drying any perspiration. He felt better now that he was in dry clothes and the exercise from biking was warming up his body.

Mihashi thought back to the locker room and remembered Abe's soft words. Abe's smile still flashed before his mind and Mihashi couldn't help but smile at the image. Ever since Mihashi had joined the team, Abe was always there to catch Mihashi when he fell. He would always be grateful to him. But instead of expressing his thanks to Abe in the locker room, he had almost cried instead.

"Abe must think I'm such a crybaby," Mihashi thought bitterly, watching the last rays of sun disappear from the sky. "The whole team has to be so careful around me and act as though I'm about to break any second…I'm such a pain." His eyes stung as tears began to fill his eyes, but instead of letting them fall, he quickly wiped them away. Mihashi let out a small laugh. "What would my friends think of me now?"

Friends. They were his friends. At the beginning, they were only teammates. Mihashi was almost positive that some had even hated him on site but as the weeks of practice went on, without realizing it, his bond with his team grew. While he was at Mihoshi, Mihashi never had any true friends, but now it was different.

Mihashi glanced around, noticing only now that the street lamps had flickered on and dim stars shown above.

"Ah!" Mihashi let out a startled gasp and began to peddle faster towards home. His mother had warned him not be home late but Mihashi had absentmindedly decided to take the long way home. "I'm going to be in so much trouble!" He set forth blindly, the lamps above barely lighting up his path, and shadows jumped out at him randomly from the narrow street. His mind was racing, his fast beating heart pumping adrenaline into his veins.

"Only a couple more blocks to go," Mihashi tried to reason with his overly tired body, the afternoon practice beginning to take its toll on his muscles. Several unlikely scenarios were running through his mind about what would happen when he opened the front door of his house. The least likely being that his mother wouldn't be home and he could get away with his tardiness scotch free, however unlikely that was. The other extreme possibility revolved around his mother being so mad that she forced him to quit the team. Mihashi shuddered at the thought. Maybe he shouldn't go home just yet…

Without warning, a fist-sized rock came rocketing towards Mihashi. Because of the dark, he only had a second's notice before it hit him directly on the left shoulder, bouncing off of him with a sickening crunch. The momentum sent Mihashi tumbling off his bike, skidding across the wet gravel pavement, and finally stopping in the middle of the empty street.

Mihashi groaned. His body tingled with pain from his freshly scrapped arms and legs and he could already feel his shoulder throb with the promise of a bruise. He was afraid to even try and move. The water on the damp street had already soaked into Mihashi's clothes, chilling him.

After what seemed like hours, he tried to sit up, wondering where the rock had come from. His question was quickly answered as figures snuck out of a nearby ally, snickers echoing off the walls.

"Nice shot!"

"You sure got him good, Hatake!"

Mihashi froze. That name caused every muscle in his body to clench with fear. He could feel his heartbeat racing.

"No…" Mihashi practically sobbed, trying desperately to hold onto reality. Hatake, the catcher from Team Mihoshi. The name that haunted his nightmares, the bully who made him live his middle school days in constant fear.

Mihashi's forearm started to sting with remembered pain as Mihashi was thrown into his haunted past. It was at the end of the school year last year when Hatake had stalked up to him in the same fashion, like a lion waiting to pounce on its injured prey. Mihashi was walking home. Team Mihoshi had just lost yet another baseball game when Hatake had snapped. He had chased after Mihashi, and when he finally caught up with him, he exploded. Mihashi, who felt guilty enough for allowing his team to fail so miserably, allowed the insults to be screamed at him. Suddenly, a quick kick to the stomach sent the depressed pitcher falling to the ground, clutching his bruised ribs and gasping for breath. Bile threatened to come up from his stomach.

"You piece of shit," Hatake growled in Mihashi's ear, pinching the pressure points in the back of Mihashi's neck and forcing him to stand up again.

Mihashi cried out in pain, his neck muscles instantly cramping up. His stomach screamed in agony and his legs were shaking so bad that he feared when Hatake let go he would fall right back to the ground. Though his mind was screaming at him to get away, a small part of his mind was whispering to Mihashi that he deserved this for making his team fail all those years. It was this small voice that made Mihashi not fight back as Hatake continued to punch him. Mihashi was so full of pain that he couldn't help as tears streamed from his eyes.

It wasn't until Hatake roughly grabbed Mihashi's arm and started twisting, threatening to break it, that Mihashi broke out of his daze. Natural instincts kicked in, and Mihashi tried violently to wrench his arm free. Mihashi's frightened scream quickly morphed into sobs.

"P-p-please, please d-d-don't hurt me! I-I-I'm s-s-sorry, I-I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Mihashi choked out in between shaky breaths.

"Swear that you will never play baseball ever again," Hatake yelled, never letting go of Mihashi's arm.

"Forever?" Mihashi thought quickly to himself.

Mihashi hesitated for only a moment but that was enough for Hatake to twist Mihashi's arm a little bit more. Mihashi screamed as every nerve in his arm flared with pain, tears continuing to stream down his face. Mihashi's life had been pitching. He practiced every day, trying to get better and please his team. He had failed.

"…y-yes…al-alright," Mihashi whispered.

Hatake dropped his arm and walked away without a backward glance.

Mihashi really hadn't meant to join a new baseball team. Hatake's unspoken threat was still fresh in his mind but Momoe picked him up and threw him on the team without consulting him at all. There was even a time when Mihashi was having so much fun with Abe and the others that Hatake slipped his mind. That was until they were to face Team Mihoshi for their first game of the season. Mihashi couldn't sleep the week preceding the game, too scared that Hatake would come while he was sleeping and hurt him.

When they finally faced Mihoshi, Mihashi was positive that Hatake was going to kill him right then and there. Much to his surprise, the team had instead admitted to being wrong and wanted Mihashi back. He was amazed. He truly believed that they were sorry.

Now, as four or five Mihoshi team members surrounded Mihashi, he could almost laugh at his stupidity, knowing now that they apologies were as hallow as a metal bat. Mihashi had gone against his word and now he was going to pay for it.

"What did I say, Mihashi?" Hatake taunted. "Did you think I'd forget about our little agreement? That my apology was sincere and three years of middle school would just be washed away in a simple bow of the head?"

Mihashi's body was shaking as a cold sweat coated his forehead. "I-I-I-I d-d-didn't," Mihashi began, trying to explain that it wasn't his fault he was put on the team, but he was too scared to get the words out. Hatake, already sick of Mihashi's stuttering, kicked him hard in the stomach, quickly shutting the annoying boy up.

"To hell with you! Kanou wasn't able to pitch at all during middle school because of you! He was always the better pitcher, and you knew it. That's why you wouldn't step down. You make me sick," Hatake spat. The four other teammates had gone silent, too scared to say anything. They glanced at each other with nervous excitement.

Mihashi groaned, trying to recover from the blow to the stomach. He couldn't think logically. Some naïve section of his mind tried to reason that this was part of a sick nightmare his tired brain conjured up. He would wake up any moment now, tangled up in his bed sheets. The most injury he would receive would result from falling off the bed. The blood flowing out of his arms and legs, the jolts of pain resonating from his shoulder, and the cold wet clothes that clung to his body told his mind that what was happening to him was very real. If he didn't get away soon, he would be lucky to get away with just a couple bruised ribs and a dislocated shoulder.

"The reason you won against us was pure luck. Everyone thought you were a joke so we barely even tried to win," Hatake growled. "We all know the truth: you're just a stupid, broken, worthless pitcher." Hatake circled around Mihashi, soaking in the feeling of absolute power and control he had over the cowering boy. "I should have broken your arm when I had the chance. Maybe then you wouldn't have run off to ruin yet another team's future."

Mihashi's eyes widened. Hatake's words seemed to seep, little by little, into his very soul as much as Mihashi tried not to listen. He thought that they were his friends. His new teammates had smiled and laughed with him, had told him "good job" after striking a person out, and Abe was making him a stronger pitcher with every day that passed. He wasn't ruining their careers.

Was he?

Hatake watched as his words affected Mihashi. He had been by the boy's miserable side since the beginning of middle school and knew him well enough to know that with Mihashi, emotional blows were worse than physical ones. The boy's mind was beginning to crumble and just when Hatake judged that the boy could go no lower, he would go in for the kill, finally breaking his arm and insuring that the boy could never again play baseball.

Hatake still boiled with rage when he looked at the weakened pitcher. He remembered those long summer middle school days as if it were yesterday. Mihashi would be throwing slow and uncontrolled pitches during a game as if it didn't matter whether they won or lost. Hatake didn't see why Mihashi deserved hand signals from him so he would just stare at Mihashi from behind home plate. They were going to lose anyway. Hatake would glance over at the dugout only to see Kanou's eager face. Kanou wanted to play so bad. He practiced harder than Mihashi, even if he knew he wasn't going to pitch in the next game.

But that bastard wouldn't get off the pitcher's mound. Even if they were losing by over ten points, that stubborn ass wouldn't move. He'd keep on pitching as if he knew he was digging their graves. Hatake felt his face twist into a deep scowl. He'd make Mihashi pay.

Mihashi sat silently in the street, his mind racing. With every second that passed, he successfully convinced himself that he was an ugly virus in the team, just waiting to infect the other players with his selfish, worthless tendencies. Momoe's smile, Tajima's pats on the back, and even the feel of Abe's hand on his hand were washed from his mind with a cold, ruthless reality; a reality that consisted of empty promises, snide remarks, and emotionless actions. Maybe his teammates weren't his friends. They could have been pretending all this time, whispering behind his back, laughing at him in the shadows of the dugout. The thoughts alone almost made Mihashi sick to his stomach.

"Come on, Mihashi! What's wrong? How does it feel to step off of your high horse?" Hatake resumed circling Mihashi. "If you won't step down from the mound, then I'll force you to!" Hatake roughly grabbed Mihashi's right arm.

Mihashi was jerked suddenly into reality by Hatake and screamed. The muscles in his body were clenched so tightly that even moving an inch caused them to creak in discomfort. Though Mihashi could see Hatake grab him arm and start to drag his body more towards the side of the road, he could no longer feel it. The cold night had caused his drenched body to go numb. His mind could see no way out, long since exhausting the fight or flight response, and therefore had partially shut down. His limp body was dragged across the rough pavement as if it were a corpse. Mihashi couldn't feel his school uniform tearing, snagging on the sharp pebbles beneath him. Instead, Mihashi's mind raced through never ending scenarios of punishment and death, of betrayal and mistrust. All physical wants and needs were thrown to the back of his mind.

Hatake and his fellow teammates were trying to move the unresponsive pitcher into the back ally, where they could break his arm slowly and painfully. The boy was just making too much noise for them to continue in the open street.

Just then, two bright headlights, coming towards them from down the street, blinded them all. The car's honk echoed throughout the silent night. Hatake was frozen in place, not sure of what to do. He still had Mihashi's cold arm gripped in one hand but the light had caused a moment of amnesia. The car was coming fast, but Hatake continued to stare for what seemed like hours.

"Hatake! We gotta get out of here!" Shuzo's voice melted his frozen body, finally pulling his eyes away from the oncoming car.

Hatake quickly let Mihashi's arm fall, retreating from the scene with his teammates.

"Don't think I won't be back! You'll get what you deserve!" Hatake bellowed, glancing over his shoulder at Mihashi. The anger and thirst for revenge was still so fresh in his mind. He'd be back for Mihashi. It might not be today, but he'd make sure Mihashi paid for the way he treated Kanou and his team. He felt a pang of regret that he wasn't able to finish the job tonight, but if he and the others were caught, they would be expelled.

The car rolled to a stop in front of Mihashi. The driver jumped out of his car, afraid that he'd find the motionless body unconscious or dead. He thought that the group of teenagers was just hanging out in the street. The driver didn't expect, as he knelt down beside Mihashi, to find a body lying unresponsive and beaten up.

"Hey, kid! Are you ok? Can you get up?" the driver asked frantically, grabbing the Mihashi's side and rolling him over so that boy was lying on his back. Mihashi cringed as his body was turned around, and let a pained moan escape his lips. The driver sighed in relief. At least the kid wasn't dead.

Mihashi slowly opened his eyes, expecting to see Hatake standing over him, but instead saw a middle aged man, whose face was tight with worry.

"Who?" Mihashi managed to croak out before he felt fluid fill his lungs, sending him into a coughing fit.

"Take it easy there," the stranger consoled, helping Mihashi sit up to allow him to breathe easier. "What happened?"

Mihashi had finished coughing, but his throat remained raw and scratchy. His eyes burned with fresh tears just remembering Hatake's face and his promised revenge. Mihashi wanted to burst, to tell this man all that had happened and how unfair it was and how much he hurt, but in the end, he couldn't do it. Why make another person suffer with his problems and self-pity?

"N-n-nothing…h-happened," Mihashi lied, clenching his bruised stomach.

The driver could clearly tell the young boy wasn't telling the truth, but pressuring the him with questions now wouldn't result in getting any answers. Since Mihashi had sat up, the car's headlights shown on him like a spotlight. Though there were no major cuts on his face, the older man could see streams of blood dripping down his cheeks from wiping his face with his torn up arms. Blood had soaked through his filthy school jacket and his pants were torn from when he was dragged across the street. Even in the darkness, the driver could tell the boy was soaked to the bone and shivering. He looked so small and fragile that the driver couldn't believe that bullies would have to go to this extent to prove whatever sick point they had in mind.

"Where do you live? I'll give you a ride home," the man offered, his conscience not allowing him to do any less.

Mihashi shook his head. "I-I-I-I l-live j-just down the s-s-street," Mihashi pointed a shaking finger to a fairly large house located behind trees near the end of the road.

The man looked at Mihashi skeptically. "I'll walk you home."

Mihashi nodded, not knowing if he could make it home by himself. The older man helped him stand up, which resulted in another round of coughing. His bruised chest made breathing difficult and Mihashi found himself short of breath from just standing up. His wrist and shoulder were still throbbing, but Mihashi knew he had to get home. Every shadow in the street, every sound or wisp of the wind could be Hatake waiting for him and Mihashi was about to jump out of his skin from the overwhelming anxiety.

The two walked slowly towards Mihashi's house after the man pulled his car to the side and grabbed the boy's forgotten bicycle. The man kept throwing worried glances at the slightly limping boy, wondering what might have happened if he hadn't shown up.

"T-t-thank you," Mihashi whispered suddenly, his head tilted towards the ground.

"It's no problem. I'm just glad I was in the right place at the right time. You should really be more careful, you know that?" The driver replied.

Mihashi's throat tightened up as fresh tears sprang up in his eyes, so he nodded instead of responding. This man who he had met only minutes before was concerned with him and was making sure he was okay. Maybe Mihashi wasn't the mean, selfish pitcher that Hatake made him out to be. If he deserved to get beat up for being a horrible person, why would a complete stranger help him? Questions raced around his head, causing his headache to pound harder.

"Is this your house?" the driver asked, pulling Mihashi out of his daze.

"Y-y-yeah, t-thank you so much," Mihashi mumbled, taking his bike from the stranger. He bowed his head in thanks, but even the slight tilt of his head sent him in a dizzy spell. Mihashi looked up to see two heads of the concerned stranger swirling around his vision instead of just one, making his already painful stomach clench in discomfort.

"Just get inside and take care of those cuts," the driver advised, waving to Mihashi as he turned and walked back to his car.

Mihashi's smile was short lived. His whole body ached and his headache was only getting worse with each passing moment. He entered his house without any trouble and found it funny when his mother didn't run up to greet him right away. Maybe she really was gone? Mihashi knew that he should take a bath and clean some of the cuts he received, but his brain could hardly function as it was.

Each step was painful and his body felt weighted down by lead. Mihashi barely made it to his bed before collapsing into an exhausted sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

I know it has been a very very long time since I put up the first chapter but thanks to my obsessed and persistent friend Liann, I am now able to present the second chapter. Thank you and enjoy.

A special thanks to all the people who have reviewed. It really gives me motivation! More than you ever know! Thank you. Now on to the chapter.

XxXxXxX

A Love Worth Fighting For

Chapter 2

"Ren?" Mihashi's mother called from the kitchen where she was making lunch. She had found it odd when her son had not gotten up at his usual 6 AM time to go to his morning practice but had quickly dismissed it. Hearing Mihashi come home late last night, she figured that with such a long, grueling practice, Momoe might have decided to give the boys the morning off. So Mrs. Mihashi had let her son sleep in, hoping he enjoyed this rare commodity. However, it was quickly growing to be late morning and if she waited any longer to wake him, he would be late for school. "Ren, dear, you have to get up!" she called again.

Mrs. Mihashi finished wrapping her third onigiri when she noticed Ren had still not appeared from behind his closed bedroom door. "He must really be in a deep sleep," she mused, walking over and opening the door to his room. She had been wondering if Ren was getting enough sleep lately…

She gasped, hands quickly flying up to cover her mouth. Her mind became numb as her eyes fell on the sight in front of her. Mihashi's small, thin body was sprawled on the bed. Small pools of blood that had dripped from his cuts had soaked into the white sheets. There was dirt and mud smeared all over his body. A thin trail of blood had crusted on his cheek, leaving a dark red streak across his porcelain face.

"R-Ren," Mrs. Mihashi choked, feeling her knees becoming weak, "REN!" Hysterical, the mother ran to her son, intending on shaking him until he woke up but as she got closer, her hands stopped in mid-air, trembling horribly. Instead of violently rousing him, she softly laid her hands on his damp back. "Ren, oh my god, Ren, please wake up!" Tears were quickly falling down her cheeks. "Ren!" She shook a little harder.

A small groan escaped Ren's slightly parted lips, but that was all Mrs. Mihashi needed to hear. She let out a crazed laugh, crying out in joy.

"Ren, please wake up! What's wrong? What happened? Oh God, we need to go to the doctor. Maybe I should call 9-1-1," Mrs. Mihashi rambled more to herself than her son.

Mihashi slowly opened his eyes, the morning sun shinning through his bedroom window and landing directly in his eyes. The blinding rays disoriented him. Where was he? How did he get there? Why was his mom with him? Was it time to go to practice? His internal confusion along with his frantic mother only caused an increasingly sharp pain to shoot across his temples. He could feel his body ache but he wasn't sure why.

"Ren, where did you get all these cuts?" his mother whispered fearfully, while softly petting his hair, afraid to do anything else.

With that simple question, his brain was over-flooded with painful memories of the night before. Flashes of Hatake, of fists flying, and the crunching sound of feet connecting with his chest seemed to overwhelm him. His lungs constricted, his body shaking unconsciously.

"Ren?"

He couldn't bear to look at his mother, to reveal to her just how weak he truly was. Mihashi closed his eyes tight, wishing he were still asleep but he could still feel his mother's hands move slowly through his hair, and the smell of toast and eggs wafted from her apron. When he took a shaky breath in, his ribs screamed in protest and sent him into a coughing spasm.

Mrs. Mihashi quickly helped her son up into a sitting position. "Where does it hurt?"

Mihashi clutched his stomach. "H-here," he whispered.

_Maybe then you wouldn't have run off to ruin yet another team's future. _

Hatake's words echoed in Mihashi's head. He reached up, gripping his hair tight. Dark thoughts swirled inside his mind as emotions raged inside his heart. Any warmth left inside of him was covered up by a consuming emptiness. His newfound friends, the one team that might have accepted him and stayed by his side was all just a childish fantasy he mustered up. For the past couple weeks, Mihashi had been living a lie. Every smile and compliment was nothing more than fake friendship, amusement, a way to pass the time.

Hatake was right of course, Mihashi realized. He would only hurt the team more if he continued to play for them. He was weak and slow where Abe was so talented. He deserved someone better than Mihashi.

_Swear that you will never play baseball ever again!_

Mihashi cringed, tears already falling down his face. He had been playing baseball since he was a little boy. To give up that easily…but if he didn't want to face Hatake again, Mihashi knew that he would have to quit baseball. The pain of that thought alone threatened to swallow him whole.

"_I'm sorry, Abe-kun."_

Mrs. Mihashi watched as her son, who was not in the least bit distressed about his own injuries, slowly curled up into a little ball. She couldn't even begin to imagine what he had been through but for now she could at least take care of his physical needs. Maybe there would come a day when Ren trusted her enough to help heal the emotional trauma she knew her son endured.

"Come on, Ren. Let's get your cuts cleaned up." When Ren didn't respond, Mrs. Mihashi helped her son stand up and lead him to the bathroom.

XxXxXxXx

Abe sat nervously, glancing at his cell phone every few seconds, which was discreetly hidden behind his leg. Mihashi hadn't show up for morning practice and that worried him endlessly.

"_Last night, Mihashi hadn't seemed sick, though due to him being in those wet clothes for so long he could have contracted something. Maybe he had a dentist appointment and just forgot to tell to tell one of us…but that's not like Mihashi. He would have at least sent a text_," Abe glanced down at his phone again. It was still just a blank screen with the time hanging tauntingly in the corner. "_Damn it_."

Abe knew he was being reckless and stupid, that it was possible that Mihashi had just over slept and was going to show up for evening practice, but he couldn't help thinking that wasn't it. Abe felt useless in the matter of finding out his pitcher's whereabouts. He looked up from his cell phone to see his English teacher still writing sentences on the board.

"_Maybe if I just send him a text just to ask him where he is…"_ Abe contemplated, but he could already picture what Mihashi would do when he saw that text. He would read the innocent question, his hand would start to shake with tears welling up in his eyes and an immense feeling of guilt would overwhelm him. He couldn't put Mihashi through that, especially if the boy had only overslept. Abe would probably traumatize him into waking up at 3:00 in the morning in fear of sleeping through his alarm clock. "_Damn it Mihashi, why do you have to make this so difficult!_"

"Abe-kun, can you please translate the sentence for us?" his English teacher asked sweetly, knowing full well that he wasn't paying attention.

Abe sighed deeply, not having a clue as to what the sentence on the board was pertaining to. As he ­brutally mutilated the sentence out loud, concerns for Mihashi were still in the back of his mind.

"_I'll send him a text_," Abe decided, since it seemed the only solution that would give him some peace of mind. But why was he so concerned in the first place? Had he really grown that close to Mihashi in such a short amount of time to be in this state?

They were a team, a battery. It only makes sense for them to be as close as they are now. Of course he should be concerned where Mihashi is. It is kind of hard to practice catching without the pitcher there.

Feeling more at ease, Abe once again carefully hid his cell phone and typed out a quick simple message, sending it before he had any more second thoughts. With the message sent, all Abe could do now was hope Mihashi had his cell phone on him. He finally opened his notebook and began jotting down notes in hopes that his teacher wouldn't call on him again.

"_I just hope you're alright…"_

XxXxXxX

Mihashi woke suddenly to the sound of bells dinging and the soft vibration of his phone, which was buried under his sheets. Sitting up a little too quickly, he found himself leaning over his bed, attempting not to throw up due to the sudden vertigo. Once the walls stopped spinning, Mihashi reached under the covers and grabbed his cell phone. His mother had made sure he had it before she left for her part time job. She felt horribly guilty leaving Mihashi alone when he was so hurt but she had bandaged him up the best she could and made sure that his phone was within reach if he had any problems. It had taken Mihashi several long minutes to convince his mom that he was fine and that there was nothing she could do if she stayed. Mihashi felt more relaxed now that she was gone. He didn't want to be a burden, especially if it kept him mom away from her job.

Mihashi's body was wrapped in various bandages, making him feel every stiff. With his head throbbing and stomach cramping up, Mihashi opened his cell phone with shaky fingers. "One New Message" was illuminated. For a second, deep fear ran through him. Had Hatake somehow gotten his cell phone number? Was he still threatening him, making sure Mihashi had not forgotten his end of the deal?

Mihashi put the phone down, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. He knew he was just being paranoid. Hatake had probably not gotten his cell phone number. How could he? Hatake knew that he had scared Mihashi enough that he didn't need to remind him.

Taking the deepest breath his ribs would allow, Mihashi picked up his phone again and pressed "read message." Much to his surprise, he saw that the message was instead from Abe. A new fear blossomed. It was not the fear of hurt and pain, but instead of great disappointment. Mihashi knew he had missed today's morning practice. He had forgot to set his alarm after he got home.

Mihashi squeezed his eyes tightly, tears threatening to fall. It just hurt so much. How could he ever have survived morning's practice? Even the simple act of sitting up in his bed made him feel a constant pulse of pain from his stomach that was only slightly deluded from the aspirin his mother had given him before she left. Mihashi knew his team was counting on him to be there this morning and he had let them down. "_Again_," Mihashi reminded himself guiltily. Now Abe was probably going to yell at him, demand to know where he was and what he was doing now and how he was going to make it up to them later.

Arm shaking both from nerves and physical exertion, Mihashi scrolled down to read the message.

"Are you alright?"

The simple sentence jumped out of the screen and gripped his chest, squeezing painfully. No, instead of Abe expressing anger, hostility, regret for having Mihashi as his pitcher, he showed concern. His new team had put up with so much and how does he repay them?

"_By not going to practice…"_ Mihashi thought, hanging his head shamefully. It shouldn't matter if he was a little hurt or not. He should have been there, supporting the team that at least gave the illusion that they cared, practicing with a pitcher that actually gave hand signals back. Mihashi had been sore from practice before. The way his body was feeling now shouldn't be too different.

Mihashi only shifted his legs over the side of the bed but his stomach clenched painfully and his chest constricted, forcing him to hold his breath as he rode out the waves of pain.

"_Damn it!_" Mihashi thought bitterly, tears already streaming down his face. When his mother had woken him up this morning and slowly moved him to the bathroom, he felt as if his muscles were tearing violently in his body. He had stood in front of the mirror and staring back was a too skinny body with dark purple and sickly green bruises scattered across his chest and arms almost artistically. Thankfully there were no broken bones. His mother had repeatedly tried to ask him what had happened but every time he opened his mouth to answer his throat tightened and only choked air escaped. His subconscious wasn't even allowing him to tell his mother what Hatake had done.

But even after all the horrible things Hatake had said about Nishiura, Abe still took the time to try and contact him. Mihashi glanced at them time, noting that Abe was in the middle of one of his classes.

"_He could have gotten caught…"_ Mihashi thought skeptically. He wouldn't have risked getting in trouble just to find out of he was ok or not, right? "_But he needs me to practice…_" Sure, Hanai was the backup pitcher but Mihashi felt nervous letting another pitcher practice with Abe. "_What if he likes Hanai better than me? What if he just throws me away if he finds something better_." He tried to be worth having Abe as his catcher. That's one of the main reasons why Mihashi practiced pitching in his yard even after practice was finished. He knew that Abe hated it but his fear of being pushed aside forced him to wake up, some times at odd hours in the night, and pitch.

"_I promised him…I'd always be there…"_

The promise that neither of them were going to get sick or hurt, that him and Abe were always going to be there for each other.

But Mihashi was going to have to break that promise. Hatake was going to make sure of that.

"_I need to go. I need to tell him that I…I'm not going to pitch anymore._"

Mihashi forced his body over the side of the bed, landing awkwardly on his feet and biting his cheek to get his mind off of the pain exploding throughout the rest of his body. He had to do this…his team deserved so much better than he could ever possibly give. Abe deserved better.

Picking up his cell phone again, Mihashi pressed reply to Abe's message but couldn't seem to think of anything to type back. Was he ok? He was about to drag his bruised body to high school, quit his baseball team, all while dealing with threats from Hatake. No, he was not ok by any standard.

Instead of answering the question, Mihashi shut his phone. He just couldn't bring himself to write back to the catcher that soon wouldn't be his anymore. The guilt was crawling up his back, making him shiver. Slowly, Mihashi put on his school uniform and prepared to leave for school.

XxXxXxXxX

"_Oh man, why does school have to be so boring!"_ Tajima screamed inside his head, wanting nothing more to run out of the room. "_Or jump out of the window…" _Tajima had already accepted the fact that he was terrible in school and was banking on an athletic scholarship to get him into a local university. Usually he could share his academic failures with Mihashi, but he hadn't shown up for morning's practice. Each practice was extremely important, as the summer tournament loomed closer each day. Everyone was a little nervous when they noticed Mihashi hadn't arrived, but none more than Abe. Even though this morning was an endurance practice and Mihashi wasn't needed to pitch, Abe still scanned the gate every few minutes, searching for his pitcher.

"Fuck, I wanna know where he is too!" Tajima grumbled. He felt that Mihashi and him had grown to be close friends over the past couple weeks. Mihashi's subdued attitude made Tajima feel comfortable and able to freely express himself, more so than usual.

His math teacher continued to drone on about polynomials or something of the sort…Tajima had stopped listening anyway. Lunch had come and passed. Of course, Tajima had eaten his customary meal of what could be considered two lunches but two hours later his stomach was growling at him angrily.

"_So hungry! I'll have to have something before practice…"_

Tajima had half expected Mihashi to come scurrying in during lunch period, stammering and sputtering the way he does when he knows he's in trouble. But the classroom doorway had remained empty…well that is besides Abe and Hanai coming in to say a quick hello. The two of them often came in to visit, but this time, Tajima eyed Abe suspiciously, instantly read deeper into the action. Sure Abe's voice was calm and collected but Tajima was a genius when it came to reading small details, especially in body language. It was one of the talents that allowed him to hit Kanou's forkball on the first try. He could memorize mannerisms and understand the meaning behind them without any trouble at all. However, it was rare that he would actually put in the effort to analyze his friends.

However, Abe intrigued him. There was just so much that Abe didn't show…or at least think he wasn't showing. When Abe walked into the room, Tajima noticed the way that his eyes quickly yet subtly scanned the room even after making eye contact with him, Hamada, and Izumi. Or how his mouth frowned just a minuscule amount and his hand automatically flinched to grab his cell phone once he noticed that Mihashi wasn't there. Yes, there was much Abe wasn't telling.

"_But I have secrets of my own,_" Tajima smiled to himself.

The math lecture had come to an end. During the small passing period break, Tajima reached into his backpack and pulled out a granola bar. So much for waiting until practice…

Out of the corner of his eye, Tajima noticed a tuff of orange hair peak in behind the doorway. Slowly, Mihashi crept inside the classroom, trying to make himself as small and unnoticeable as possible. Of course, his nervous habits only made his movements jerkier and more showy than usual, thus everyone in the room soon looked over to notice him. They didn't look long though. It seemed as though only the members of the baseball team really knew how strong and talented Mihashi was. Everyone else only saw him as a shy, timid boy, if they cared to acknowledge him at all that is.

"Mihashi!" Tajima ran up to the pitcher, flashing an obnoxious grin once the boy had stumbled into his seat.

Mihashi jumped but didn't say anything back. Instead, he stared intently at his desk as if determined not to look up. Confused, Tajima was about to ask him what was wrong when he noticed that it looked like Mihashi was panting. His skin was flushed in a light pink but he was shaking.

Tajima frowned. Something was definitely wrong.

Kneeling down beside the desk, Tajima tried to look at Mihashi's face but the other boy flinched away. "Mihashi?" he coaxed. Tajima made sure that he appeared calm and relaxed but a heavy, cold feeling was settling in his stomach. He was used to Mihashi having mood swings and crying at random moments but this was different. "What's wrong?" he asked softly.

Mihashi flinched again but still didn't look at him.

"Ok, everyone to their seats. Class is starting." The history teacher demanded, walking in and setting her briefcase on the desk.

Tajima sighed and continued to stare at Mihashi for a few more seconds before getting up and walking to his desk. What could possibly be wrong? Did someone die in his family? A pet? But Tajima didn't think that Mihashi had a pet. At least, he didn't see one when they all went over to study on Mihashi's birthday. Was he nervous about school? About missing this morning's practice?

"_He should know that he can talk to me…"_

Hamada and Izumi both locked eyes with Tajima as he reached his desk, their gaze searching for answers. But Tajima had none to give. Shrugging, he sat down and their final class of the day began.

"_What's wrong, Mihashi…"_


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Oh wow. Yes I am still alive. I do apologize. This past year was my first year at college and classes, friends, and studying took over my life. There was never a dull moment. However, over the summer I got to read everyone's comments on this fic and it really truly inspired me to write more! So I want to thank all of you for you kind words. They mean more than you know. Also, I thank my wonderful friend Liann for keeping me inspired with her fanart for this fic, and for proofing. She is an amazing person. Please enjoy the chapter!

XxXxX

Love Worth Fighting For

Chapter 3

"_Just don't look back_," Mihashi screamed inside his head. Even without looking, he could feel Tajima's and Izumi's eyes staring at him. When Tajima had come over and greeted him, Mihashi wanted nothing more than to cry and blurt out everything that had happened in the past twenty-four hours. He knew that Tajima wouldn't have judged him or gotten mad at him for being scared or hurt. He would have listened. But he would have also forced him to stay on the team. Tajima wouldn't have necessarily blown off Hatake's threats, but he just didn't know Hatake. He didn't know how far Hatake could take things until he got what he wanted. If Mihashi stayed on the team, it would only be a matter of time before he was hunted again.

That was the reason why Mihashi couldn't turn around. If he did, his fragile mental state would shatter and he would get sucked right back into the team without thinking twice about the consequences. Not only would Mihashi get hurt in the end, but he also didn't want to lead his team on any longer than he needed to. They deserved more than he could possibly give.

Class went on as usual, the minutes seeming to slow to a tantalizing crawl as time ticked closer and closer to the end of school. Mihashi was, for once, grateful for the imagined extra time to regroup himself. The trip over to school hadn't been easy. It took him nearly twice as long to reach his classroom. Adding paranoia to his already delicate state didn't help. Even though Mihashi tried to rationalize with himself that Hatake was gone and in school, he couldn't help but envision him standing just around the next corner, waiting. His threats of a continued revenge were still fresh in his mind, causing a severe anxiety to appear. Even though he was now safe in his classroom, Mihashi couldn't suppress a wave of dread that came over him, causing goose bumps to spread over his body.

All too soon, the bell rang. Chairs scrapped against the tile floor, the mindless, excited chatter from the students filled the previous silence of the classroom. The routine of hearing the last bell of the day did nothing to ease Mihashi's nerves. Usually he would jump up from his desk and rush down to baseball practice. But knowing what he had to do today, he could hardly breathe. Students began filing out of the room, but when Mihashi made an attempt to get out of his seat, his muscles cramped suddenly, causing a wave of nausea to wash over him. He quickly bit down on his tongue to keep from screaming.

A hand gripped his shoulder. "Mihashi, what's wrong?" Tajima whispered.

Mihashi let out a choked groan, whether it was due to pain or his teammate he wasn't sure, and shook his head. He couldn't bear to look at Tajima, and he knew that Izumi was standing right behind him as well, waiting for an explanation. He had to do this for the team! Why couldn't they understand that if he looked at them, everything would come undone? That in the end, they would end up hurting just as much as he would.

He wouldn't let his team suffer because of his selfishness.

Mihashi tried to force his face into a smile, hoping to ease his teammates' concern, but it ended up more as a grimace.

"I-I-I'm fine," he stammered. Tajima's hand, which was still resting on his shoulder, tightened just slightly, but the small movement sent a bone chilling fear throughout his body. For a moment, he forgot how to breathe.

Tajima must have sensed his teammate's distress: the way Mihashi's eyes widened, his body stiffened, the utterly horrified yet completely vulnerable face, for he let go of Mihashi's shoulder as if burned. Tajima didn't know what to do. Did Mihashi need space? Comfort? He still didn't know what was troubling the small boy. He glanced back to Izumi but he held a blank, troubled expression, clearly not sure what was wrong or how to proceed.

Mihashi, of course, knew Tajima would never hurt him, but that minor touch sent his mind reeling in flashbacks of the previous night, unable to control himself. The pain of his body, the turmoil of his mind and emotions, the mere thought of stepping off the pitchers mound.

Baseball. His team. His catcher.

_Abe-kun._

Mihashi choked a stifled sob, surprised and confused at how much Abe's name meant to him. Abe was the first person to actually believe in him even after Mihashi spilled the secrets of his past on team Mihoshi, of his false and unjust ace position. Abe was able to see past that and make him feel he was worth _something_.

Abe could find another pitcher. "_A better pitcher…"_ Mihashi thought gloomily, not completely sure why the thought make his stomach twist uncomfortably. He would have to tell Abe about his decision to quit the team to his face, Mihashi resolved. He owed him that much. It was going to be hard; his hands were already shaking with the mere thought of Abe's reaction. Once he told him, Abe would be safe from Mihashi's self-centered personality, relieved even. He'd be able to start practicing with a new pitcher. Mihashi wasn't needed to lead the team to the championship. Abe was.

"Mihashi," a quiet whine penetrated the silence. "Please, something's wrong. Tell me."

The voice jostled Mihashi from the depths of his thoughts, and he turned to face Tajima. He stood about a foot away; his eyebrows were scrunched together, mouth held in a tight thin line, concern emanating from his eyes. Mihashi felt a warm wave spread across his chest, and he allowed a small smile to flitter across his face. Tajima's eyes widened in surprise.

Mihashi was filled with a new determination. These were good, caring people. They didn't need to be troubled with his drama, his problems. He would have to leave.

"Sorry, Tajima. I…I'm fine," Mihashi felt his mind calm slightly. "Y-you guys go to practice…I'll be there soon."

Tajima gave a skeptical glance, clearly not fooled, but he wasn't about to make Mihashi more uncomfortable than he already was.

"You sure you're ok? Maybe we could take you to the nurse's office-"

"T-Tajima!" a frustrating blush stained Mihashi's cheeks. Why was he making this more difficult by showing him a false concern? _He only needs me to pitch. Once I'm not the pitcher, he won't care anymore. They just need me to keep throwing the ball… _Tears were starting to sting his eyes.

"N-n-n-no…p-please go," Mihashi managed to choke out.

Tajima could only stare in confused amazement. His brain was trying to make sense of the situation but nothing was adding up. The only thing he was able to figure out was that his questions and presence were not making Mihashi feel any better. He'd have to keep an extra close eye on him at practice tonight.

Tajima gave a short nod but upon realizing that Mihashi was no longer looking in his direction he said a quick, "sure" before walking out of the room. He felt hurt that Mihashi didn't trust him enough to confide in him but also understood that Mihashi had a right to his own privacy. It was an infuriating dilemma. Izumi was following him into the hallway.

"What do you think is wrong?" Izumi asked quietly.

"I honestly have no idea," Tajima's brow frowned, still flabbergasted by his pitcher's behavior. "Though…he could still be upset about the forkball not working out for him yesterday. I saw him and Abe talking about it in the locker room the other night. Abe could have accidently worded something poorly…" The hypothesis seemed solid. Tajima was almost 100% positive that Mihashi was still upset about the pitch, but that wouldn't have caused him to miss practice that morning. Something was missing…

Izumi hummed in annoyance, clearly not convinced that was the only reason behind Mihashi's nervousness either. "In any case, we should warn Abe."

Tajima quickly turned his head to look at the outfielder, both of them sharing a knowing smile. Izumi was right. If anyone could snap Mihashi out of the funk he was in, it was Abe. He could only imagine how the catcher kept his sanity during school today.

"Agreed. Now let's get to practice!" Tajima felt his spirits start to rise again knowing soon his team was going to be whole and practicing together once again.

XxXxX

Mihashi slowly edged out of his seat. After sitting in the same position for an entire class period, his muscles had cramped up again. He could already feel sweat dampening his forehead and his legs starting to shake in protest. With his stomach still clenching tightly into a little ball, Mihashi found he couldn't move very fast, or far for that matter, without having to stop and catch his breath. He had been avoiding using his right arm all morning, trying to awkwardly cloth himself using only his left hand. Although Mihashi was almost positive his shoulder wasn't dislocated, a nasty bruise had formed instead, leaving the area very tender and almost impossible to use.

Little by little, Mihashi inched his way to the baseball diamond. He kept desperately trying to convince himself that he was doing the right thing, that this was what the team wanted, and what he needed to do in order to stay safe and uninjured. Even if…no, when Mihashi quit the team, he wasn't sure that would stop Hatake from coming after him and that thought left Mihashi feeling even more anxious than he already was.

The calmness Mihashi had been feeling not moments before quickly turned into fear. Once he quit the team, nobody would want to hang out with him anymore. There would be no more of Tajima's one-armed hugs or Momoe's stern but proud gaze; no more stops at the convenience store with his teammates after an especially hard practice. However, the one thing that Mihashi was having the hardest time realizing is that there would be no more Abe. There would be no more hand signals back from home plate, no more unconditional concern for his health and well being, no more rare smiles that seemed saved especially for him…Abe had become a friend, but it some how went deeper than that.

Even through the pain Mihashi was experiencing limping down the school's hallway, he could happily remember staying late at practices with Abe, hoping to squeeze in just a couple more pitches before the darkness threatened to blind them. He had thought that Abe just wanted to keep practicing in order to reach a level of perfection with Mihashi, to be able to strike out any batter that dared step up to the plate, but looking back, Mihashi had felt tranquility when he was throwing to Abe, something he had never experienced when he was pitching to Hatake. It was as if there was a certain frequency both of them were tuned to, making Mihashi want to throw harder, sharper, faster, never wanting to break the bubble both of them had formed around each other. Mihashi suddenly realized that he had wanted to impress Abe. He unconsciously and non-verbally tried to remind Abe that he was Abe's pitcher, that even though Abe was clearly a higher level in baseball, Mihashi was more than willing to improve and try frantically to catch up.

Mihashi felt his face flush, either from embarrassed realization or from physical exertion, or both. It felt silly now, Mihashi mused. He could have never caught up to Abe. He could never have become what Abe was trying to train him to be, no matter how many late night practices there were. It was just another excuse to add to the list of reasons why the team was better off with Mihashi quitting.

But Mihashi couldn't help to wonder if Abe felt that same intensity those late summer nights, when the rest of the team had retired to the locker room. The same drive to keep pitching, to work hard and push their limits. He could remember Abe's piercing dark eyes as he gave a signal, Mihashi having to look away quickly to break the connection and still his mind.

Mihashi shook his head slightly to clear his thoughts. He had finally reached the double-door exit. His right arm was draped around his waist, as if trying to comfort two maladies at once. It wasn't working so well. Mihashi leaned against the door for a couple seconds, catching his breath and hoping his reddening skin would retreat back to a normal color. He didn't have to feel his forehead to know that he was burning up; he could practically see the heat waves coming off his skin.

Whatever confidence Mihashi had mustered up during school was left behind as he opened the doors and stepped towards the baseball field, knowing this was going to be the last time he was welcomed there.

XxXxX

Abe was not a happy person. Not only had Mihashi failed to text him back, but he was nowhere to be found inside the boys' locker room.

"Is he trying to drive me insane?" Abe all but growled under his breath. He had sat through the remaining hours of the school day coming up with the most gruesome and unlikely what-if scenarios his mind could dig up. It was pathetic, and it was driving Abe insane. Sure, he supposed, there was a slim, almost non-existent chance that Mihashi's mother had decided to drive him to school this morning and the drowsy mother accidently took a turn too wide and crashed into a building, sending both of them to the emergency room. Abe winced at the mental image. The realistic, and usually dominant, part of his brain told him that if there had been any type of accident, he would have been able to hear the sirens from school. However, concern for his teammate over took the logical voice inside his head.

On the outside, Abe appeared to be the same calm, calculating catcher his team knew him as. The only indication of his distress was that his eyes quickly darted to any body that walked through the main locker room doors.

"_Get control of yourself. Stop acting like an idiot_," Abe thought, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. With or without Mihashi, he had to give one hundred percent at every practice. Time could not be wasted.

"Hey, Abe!" a hand slapped him hard on the back, causing all the air to quickly exit his body. Abe coughed, trying to regain his composure. His face twisted into a scowl, his temper already thin.

Abe glared at the obnoxiously happy third baseman. Tajima's eyes scanned Abe's face before a gentle smile settled on his lips. Abe didn't like that knowing grin, making him feel very exposed and transparent. _How did he _do_ that?_ He didn't return Tajima's enthusiastic greeting.

"Guess who I just saw?" Tajima wasn't just going to dish out his news without causing Abe a little grief first. He loved when Abe's mask slipped, exposing the emotions he tried to hard to keep in check. Tajima knew that there were feelings between Abe and Mihashi that went deeper than just teammates, even if both of them were oblivious to it. He chuckled slightly when Abe's eyes narrowed in thought and then quickly snapped wide open, scanning the locker room for a certain orange-haired pitcher. Oh yes, the feelings went much deeper. "_How much longer will they dance around each other?_" he mused. This was going to be an interesting season.

Upon hearing Tajima's laugh, Abe glared at the smaller boy, cursing him under his breath. "Who?" Abe asked through clenched teeth, a million questions formulating in his mind.

"Mihashi finally decided to show up!" Tajima grinned widely. For now, he'd let the two play their game and watch from the sidelines. Besides, he had his eye on a certain other teammate. What a game indeed.

"Where is he?" Practice was about to start. If Tajima said he was coming to practice then he should already be down here, getting dressed and warming up. The last thing they needed was for Mihashi to pull a muscle. "_He could have at least texted me back…_" An annoyed scowl settled on his lips.

Tajima's face became blank.

"What is it?" Abe was surprised at the sudden mellowness, and it made him very nervous.

Tajima looked away, trying to think of the best way to explain things. Though Mihashi was often accused of over-exaggerating situations, the same could easily be said of Abe. He didn't want Abe to jump all over Mihashi, knowing the pitcher was in a very peculiar state of mind. Mihashi needed his space right now and an over concerned Abe wasn't going to help things. "Mihashi was acting very…strange," Tajima concluded lamely. "Well I mean, he came in at the beginning of the last class but when Izumi and I approached him, he was acting jumpier than usual, like he couldn't make up his mind about something. He didn't want to walk down with us, instead opting to go by himself. It was very…un-Mihashi like."

Abe understood. Mihashi was usually one of the first ones in the locker room. The boy just couldn't wait to get out on the field. "Did he say why he's acting so strange? Or why he skipped morning practice and school today?" Abe was very confused. _If Mihashi was sick, why didn't he just text someone and then stay home all day to get better? Or maybe he was feeling better and that's why he's here now? But then why is he acting all nervous? Is he afraid we'll be mad at him?_

Tajima interrupted his thoughts with a deep irritated sigh. "No, he didn't tell me anything but he is coming soon…I think," Tajima glanced behind his shoulder towards the empty doorway. "I don't know what's wrong but something definitely is so just…be nice, ok?"

"Be nice? What's that supposed to mean?" Abe frowned, crossing his arms.

Tajima could practically feel the negative energy radiating off of Abe and couldn't help but laugh. "Exactly!" The frown deepened. "Oh come on Abe, you usually don't have the time and patience to listen to Mihashi before jumping down his throat."

Abe scoffed. "I do no such thing…it just…sometimes takes him too long to complete a simple sentence…it gets irritating"

"And do you think that could be due to your dominating presence? Mihashi looks up to you Abe. He would never want to upset you," Tajima smiled slyly.

Abe blushed slightly at the bluntness of Tajima's words. He fully understood that Mihashi would never want to deliberately hurt him. That was the biggest reason for some of their miscommunications and arguments. He knew Mihashi looked up to him but couldn't understand why the timid pitcher refused to believe that he impressed Abe as well. Abe didn't mean to yell or get so irritated around Mihashi. It just seemed to…happen. It bugged him to no end that he could never fully figure out what Mihashi was thinking or why the excellent pitcher's confidence was so low, no matter how many times Abe complimented him on his control or accuracy.

And it was this admiration that made Abe even more nervous that the pitcher still hadn't shown up…or so he tried to convince himself.

"Abe! Tajima! Get out on the field and start warm ups," Momoe yelled before walking out onto the field herself. The absence of their pitcher had made everyone a bit more on edge.

"Yes!" the boys automatically answered, both startled.

The tense mood had been broken and Tajima flashed another obnoxiously large grin toward Abe before dashing out the door, leaving Abe to quickly gather his thoughts. It was harder said than done. Abe glanced one more time towards the door. If Tajima said that Mihashi was going to show up, then he was going to-

It was at that moment an orange-haired head poked into the doorway, scanning the room until his eyes caught sight of Abe and could only stare.

XxXxX

Mihashi had finally reached the locker room. He took large gulps of air, which only caused a momentary coughing spasm, and clenched his hands together trying to stop them from shaking. The walk over had been hard, but thankfully he hadn't run into anyone. Mihashi waited outside the locker room until he could breath normally. The laughter and voices of his teammates flittered through from underneath the door, causing Mihashi's heart to give a painful squeeze. He'd never again be able to spend time with them before practice, laughing at a witty comment Tajima would make or feeling inspired and energized if Hanai decided to grace the team with a motivational speech. Mihashi would be forgotten once they found a better pitcher; his name would just become a wisp in the wind, leaving as quickly as it came up in conversation.

The noise slowly softened and Mihashi knew that the team was making their way out on the field to start practice. It was a perfect day outside, and he felt a tinge of jealousy and regret that this was the day he had to quit the team.

Mihashi put his ear up to the door but could hear no one. Thinking everyone was gone, Mihashi opened the door and poked his head inside. The locker room was surprisingly clean for it being a second home to ten teenage boys, but it did give off a distinct sour smell, something that Mihashi had all but become accustomed to.

He scanned the room, when suddenly his eyes unexpectedly connected with another's. The dark brown eyes seemed to draw him in, making him feel secure and centered. But he quickly realized why he felt such at ease. It was the same eyes he gazed in before he threw every pitch. They were the eyes that lit up after every strike and calculated after every foul. They were the same ones that narrowed in frustration after a run was scored or drooped when bored. They were the eyes that belonged to Nishura's catcher.

"_Abe-kun."_

XxXxX

A/N: again, thank you all for sticking with me. :)


	4. Chapter 4

(A/N: Yes, it has been a long, long time since I've updated. I apologize to everyone and I thank you all for sticking with me and reviewing my story. Your thoughts and support give me that extra push every time I pick up the pen to write. So I thank you again. :) Please enjoy chapter 4)

Chapter 4

Abe's eyes locked onto Mihashi's, neither of them moving. Mihashi's eyes were wide with what looked to be apprehension, which only puzzled Abe. Why would Mihashi be nervous to see him? Was he afraid that he was going to yell at him for missing morning practice? "_That's ridiculous! I would never just yell…" _but as Abe took a second to think about it, he probably would have started throwing demanding questions at the small pitcher as soon as he walked through the locker room door. It was only because of Tajima's warning that Mihashi seemed more unstable than usual that Abe hadn't started throwing accusations already.

"_Why did he miss morning practice? He looks fine…quieter than usual. Has he been eating enough? He looks smaller. I wonder if he weighed himself this morning. And why isn't he coming in the locker room…what is wrong with him? Is that sweat on his forehead? Did he run here? What happened?"_ thoughts began to swirl once again in Abe's head. He wanted nothing more than to yell out his questions he knew would go unanswered unless he voiced them. Mihashi tried to keep to himself as much as possible, which frustrated Abe to no end. Abe knew his temper was too short to be patient enough for the stuttering boy but he was just so damn irritating sometimes. He wished Mihashi and him could just have a simple conversation together, get it all out on the table and voice their opinions. But as of now, he knew that one badly phrased question would send the pitcher into a spiral of emotions and anguish. He hated being the cause of Mihashi's distress. Abe only had concerned for his pitcher and his team.

Abe sighed deeply, finally breaking the visual connection with Mihashi, and rubbed a hand through his short black hair, a soothing gesture that had stayed with him from when he was a small child. When he looked back at the orange haired boy, he noted Mihashi nervously glancing at the floor, his body still half hidden by the locker room door, and Abe sighed in relief. Mihashi was here, he was safe, and practice could continue per usual. A weight that had unknowingly settled on Abe's shoulders throughout the day was instantly lifted. He internally shook his head, almost laughing at himself for acting so silly throughout the day. But the small pitcher still looked strange to him. "_Something's off…"_

"Hey," Abe greeted, hoping to break the silence and start the conversation off on neutral ground. "_Just stay calm. Don't yell. Don't jump to conclusions. Maybe he'll tell you what's going on…_" though Abe highly doubted it.

Mihashi gulped; the sudden greeting surprising him. He took a deep breath, intending to calm some of his growing nerves but his lungs quickly tightened. An annoying tickle quickly formed in the back of his throat and in an effort to get rid of it, he was unintentionally thrown into a coughing fit as his sore lungs convulsed. Abe watched for a moment, stunned, as Mihashi struggled to regain his breath before swiftly moving to his side.

"You alright? What's wrong?" Abe scanned Mihashi's keeled over form, not knowing what to do. "_He must have been sick this morning. That's why he didn't come to morning practice. Why didn't he just stay at home? Stupid kid..."_ A frown settled over the catcher's face. "_Why didn't he just text me back? I would have told him to stay home and keep hydrated. We need him to be healthy to be able to play. _"

Abe knew that the trust between himself and his pitcher was still weak. The lack of substantial communication skills between the newly formed battery hindered more than it helped, and Mihashi's rock bottom self-esteem mixed with Abe's impatient personality sometimes pushed the two to their limits. But Abe wished they could learn to work through their differences. He could see the amazing talent that Mihashi possessed. It was just under the surface. If only Mihashi could comprehend his own self worth and the fact that he had the capability to reach his absolute potential, he knew that their team could only benefit and the young pitcher could achieve his dreams of becoming an ace. But why couldn't Mihashi realize this?

"_He needs me…"_ Abe considered suddenly. Mihashi needed Abe to be there for him, to give him hand signals from home plate, praise him, and to push him out of his comfort zone. Abe knew from the moment he met Mishashi that the timid baseball player was going to need someone to support him or else he'd remain caught in his pool of self-doubt and would never be able to move past his less than ideal middle school baseball experience. But it wasn't just Abe who gave that support. Mihashi had earned the respect of the entire Nishiura team through his hard work, determination, and secret talent that had won them the game against Mihoshi. Abe couldn't be more proud. Mihashi's self-esteem was growing every day, and Abe felt special, almost embarrassed, that he was a large cause of that.

Mihashi's coughs were slowing down but he continued to stay keeled over, recovering. "_I need him too_," Abe mused slowly, letting the thought tumble uncomfortably in his mind. The thought of needing something, much less someone, was very unsettling. After his own middle school experience with Musashino, Abe chose to remain as independent as possible and the battery him and Haruna had formed through those three years was dysfunctional at best. Haruna's heart was in the game but for all the wrong reasons. It drove Abe mad. He thought high school was going to be the same situation, where the pitcher with his ego inflated, could choose which pitches he wanted to throw, leave the mound when he wanted, and not give Abe the time of day. At first, Abe strived to get Haruna's attention, to have him acknowledge his presence and listen to his ideas but he knew it was a losing battle and lost hope. That all changed when he met Mihashi. For the first time in his baseball career, Abe felt like he was in control. He had the ability to mold the naïve pitcher any way he wanted. At first, turning Mihashi into their team's ace had been a project Abe was determined to complete. But that determination was surprisingly reciprocated. Abe soon learned that Mihashi's love for the game was pure, that he wanted to be the best he humanly could. Being a catcher became fun again, instead of a chore. Not only was Abe excited to go to practice every morning and evening to improve his own personal skills but the skills of his pitcher and continue building a battery relationship that he never had in middle school. Mihashi was the spark Abe needed to renew his love for the game.

He felt his body lightly tingle at the trust and dependence Mihashi displayed when he would wait eagerly for Abe to give him a hand signal from behind home plate whether during a game or just practice. And of course Mihashi would execute the pitch perfectly, making Abe's job that much easier and exciting.

Abe knew Mihashi was a diamond in the rough and he would always be grateful that Momoe had plucked him from behind the fence on the Club Orientation day and made him their pitcher.

The subtle smile that had begun to form on Abe's face quickly melted when he saw Mihashi's small body shaking slightly, still keeled over and panting but no longer coughing.

"Mihashi! Are you ok? What's wrong?" Abe's hand hesitated only a moment before settling on Mihashi's back, thinking the soothing gesture would calm the boy.

Instead, Mihashi's body jerked out from underneath Abe's hand and fell to the ground, forming a loose ball. Abe could still see Mihashi's body shaking, though it looked to be more violent now, his face was flushed and his breathing had gotten short and shallow. Beads of sweat lined the hairline of Mihashi's face and his eyes were glued shut.

"_What did I do?" _AsAbe stared at his pitcher's small vulnerable form, a feeling of dread settled in his stomach. This was much worse than Mihashi feeling guilty about missing morning practice, feeling sick, or failing to learn the fastball pitch. Abe had never seen Mihashi so utterly distressed.

Abe slowly lowered himself to the ground besides Mihashi. He had never been good at relating to other's emotions, seeing as to how he was barely in tune with his own, but seeing Mihashi curled up into a tiny ball made his heart squeeze tightly. Mihashi continued to shake, though it was gradually decreasing in intensity but his eyes were still shut. Abe's mind was running a thousand miles per minute about what could possibly be wrong but he knew he couldn't show his distress. If he had learned anything about Mihashi by this point in the season it was that the orange haired freshman was very susceptible to other people's emotions, which could be a good and bad thing.

"Mihashi, look at me," Abe commanded.

Unfazed, Mihashi continued to sit with his eyes squeezed tightly shut.

"Mihashi!" Abe could feel pressure growing steadily at his temples. Mihashi was his pitcher. He needed to know what was wrong!

This time the pitchers body gave a sudden jump, at least letting Abe know that Mihashi could hear him.

"You need to look at me. I need to know what's wrong. Are you sick? Did you eat this morning?"

Abe watched as Mihashi's eyes quickly blinked open, his eyes moving rapidly back and forth. He knew the pitcher was at least considering telling him something and from the violent reaction to his questioning Abe could tell that it was something he wasn't necessarily going to like.

Maybe Mihashi just needed a little push to get him to open up? Praising the young pitcher usually shocked him enough to let his guard down, if only for a few moments.

"Mihashi…please. You are our pitcher, our ace. We all depend on you…and so I need you to tell me what's wrong." Abe's praise was genuine and he hoped Mihashi would sense that.

"_I need you to pitch to me_."

XxXxX

For a moment, Mihashi's mind went completely still. The turmoil that he had been experiencing since the night before seemed to still as Abe's words resonated in his ears.

"_They need me?" _Mihashi thought in disbelief. "_Why is Abe saying these things? They don't need me. Hanai or Oki can pitch in my place, right? But…I don't want to leave!"_ Mihashi pictured Nishiura's baseball mound being occupied by someone other than himself and cringed. He didn't want to leave. Being the pitcher was the only place he felt whole, the place he actually mattered and contributed to his team. "_But…but…I thought Hatake said…I'm just a virus on the time, that I have to leave. H-h-he's going to hurt me again if I don't leave. He might hurt the team_. _I have to l-l-leave…right?"_

Mihashi could feel the tears forming but he didn't have the energy to stop them from falling down his checks. Abe's words made his face feel warm. He was so concerned about Mihashi's health and well being that Mihashi felt sick to his stomach that he was going to have to destroy the growing relationship that they were forming together.

"..A-a-a-a-abe-kun…." Mihashi said quietly, scared that if he spoke to loudly reality would sink in.

Abe sat still, not moving a muscle, and his eyes were focused directly on Mihashi, trying to soak as much in as he possibly could. Mihashi felt embarrassed and uncomfortable at the degree of attention Abe was giving him.

"_I just don't want him mad at me_," Mihashi thought sadly. "_I need him to understand that I have to do this, that he deserves a better pitcher, and that the team deserves a true ace. I…I don't want to tell him about Hatake. He'll only be worried about me. I don't want that…I just need to tell him._"

"A-a-abe-kun….I…I'm o-o-ok," Mihashi started, not really knowing how to explain why he was leaving without giving away too much.

Mihashi watched as Abe's shoulders relaxed ever so slightly and felt a tinge of regret that he was going to cause Abe to become mad.

"What's wrong?" Abe spoke equally as softly, making Mihashi feel slightly more relaxed than his usual conversations with Abe, even given the extreme circumstances.

Tears started pouring down his face again. Mihashi would give anything in the world to stay on the team. He hated Hatake and his middle school teammates, who had ignored and bullied him throughout all his seasons at Mihoshi. He hated the fact that Tajima, Hama-chan, and Izumi probably wouldn't want to talk to him again in homeroom and most of all he hated that he was going to have to give up his pitching position and that Abe was going to give hand signals to someone other than himself.

"P-p-p-p-pitching…I c-c-can't…p-p-p-pitch," Mihashi sobbed, trying desperately to explain but finding it difficult for the words to come out.

"Mihashi, yes you can. You're an excellent pitcher!" Abe said, still confused as to what had brought on this sudden bout of low self-esteem. He wondered how many more times he'd have to say how great Mihashi was at pitching for it to finally sink in.

Mihashi shook his head violently.

"Yes you are!" Abe felt his temper going short, but he knew if he yelled now he'd never get anything resolved with the stuttering pitcher.

"L-l-leave...I-I-I-I h-have to, A-A-Abe-kun!" Mihashi cried out, hoping the jumbled up words would make sense. There were so many conflicting emotions and thoughts inside his trembling body that Mihashi didn't know how much more he could stand. The guilt and dread he was feeling at that moment was just too great. Baseball was his life and Hatake was forcing him to tear it down.

Through his tears, Mihashi watched as Abe's face fell and his eyebrows scrunch together in confusion. "Leave? Mihashi, what do you mean leave?" Abe yelled in frustration. "Are you sick? What's wrong?" Abe felt his patience crack and knew he couldn't keep it in check any longer. The lack of answers, communication and the added tears had made him even more anxious than before.

A loud voice suddenly echoed in the locker room. "Abe! Come on! You need to get to prac…"

Mihashi jumped at the sudden noise, his body snapping back into his previous ball like shape. He could feel his body still trembling as flashes of Hatake flew through his mind. The constant shaking and high strung nervous were wearing out Mihashi at an incredible rate. With every breath, Mihashi could feel his sore muscles moan and creek in pain and discomfort and he knew he couldn't hold out for much longer.

XxXxXx

Abe's head snapped up. Hanai was standing in the doorway to the field, mouth opened slightly as he took in the scene of a crying, balled-up Mihashi and a frustrated Abe. After a few moments, Hanai's mouth finally closed and his eyes locked with Abe's as if to say, "Is he alright?"

Abe looked down at Mihashi and gave a slight shrug, not knowing himself what was truly wrong with the young boy. He gave a deep breath, already feeling the frustration slowly leak out of his body with the interruption.

Hanai cleared his voice again, his face slightly flushed, "Um…yeah, Abe…just…just make sure you come out to practice when you're done…Momoe is getting worried…"

"Ok," Abe said in an even toned voice, not wanting to startle his pitcher any more. He noticed Mihashi's breathing was starting to slow down again since Hanai barged in, but his forehead was still beaded with sweat and his face seemed drained.

Abe heard the locker door room close as Hanai returned back to the field. He knew that he was late for practice but with Mihashi's late arrival and breakdown, he forgot for a moment that the rest of his team was practicing without them outside. Maybe what Mihashi needed was a boost of support from the whole team. That always seemed to get Mihashi in a better mood, a shock to his system even. Maybe he could get Tajima to try and talk with him again…he always seemed to understand Mihashi's unique and frustrating way of communicating in ways that Abe knew he never could. Maybe he could figure out what was wrong.

He glanced back at his pitcher.

Abe reached out to Mihashi with the back of his hand to feel his forehead. It was warm to the touch but that was most likely due to Mihashi shaking, crying, and the rush of emotions.

XxXxX

Mihashi went very still underneath his hand, his face turning red at the concern Abe was displaying. Abe's hand felt cool under his flushed face, sending little goosebumps across Mihashi's arms and the muscles in his face to relax. For a moment, his mind stilled and tears stopped falling from his eyes. A little hick-up escaped from his lips.

"Hmm," Abe mused. "You're a little warm…How do you feel? Do you feel sick?"

Mihashi shook his head slightly, still shocked. "_Why…why is Abe-kun asking me these things?_" Mihashi watched as Abe brought the same hand that was touching his forehead not a second earlier to his own forehead, his eyes scrunched in concentration, trying to determine a temperature difference between Mihashi and himself. "_He doesn't…doesn't understand that I'm leaving. He doesn't need to be…concerned about me…anymore._"

Abe dropped his hand to his side. "You should come out to practice. I have to run over some things with you. But then I want you to go home right away when I'm done. You might not feel sick but I can tell you're coming down with something. Have you been drinking enough fluids?"

The question caught him off guard, but he knew the answer. Mihashi hadn't eaten since last night's dinner and he had only had a few sips of water before he left for the high school a couple hours previous. The lack of foods and liquids could be the cause of him feeling weaker than he should but he could barely keep food and water down without feeling sick afterwards.

Mihashi's eyes scanned the room, not wanting to focus on Abe as he tried to come up with his answer.

"Well…" Abe's voice suddenly poked through his stream of thoughts. "…Just make sure you're drinking enough water and juice, ok? Juice high in Vitamin C would be really good for you right now, so have your mom stop by the store and pick you up some tonight."

Mihashi nodded his head slowly, wishing his only worry was coming down with a cold.

"Ok, let's head out to the field."

Mihashi's head snapped up as he watched Abe stand and start to walk towards his locker. Why couldn't he just say he was quitting the team and be done with it? Would Hatake be watching him from a distance at today's practice, making sure he didn't go back on his word? Would it be all right if Mihashi followed Abe out onto the field and just talked with him? Abe wanted him to go home afterwards so it's not like he would be practicing today; he definitely was in no shape to be throwing or catching balls if even walking was slightly painful. Maybe he could postpone telling Abe for a couple of days…maybe tell Abe that he did come down with a cold and couldn't practice with them. He hated lying but at least he could still be friends with his teammates at little longer…and Abe wouldn't get mad. Mihashi knew that Abe worried about him, even if it came out harsh and nagging. Tajima had to sit Mihashi down for a good hour and explain to him the concept of Abe's unique way of showing his concern before it sunk in…and even still, Mihashi was skeptical. But it was true. Abe had the most genuine intentions for him, even if Abe started yelling. Mihashi could not be more grateful to have Abe by his side.

An air of determination started to seep into his mental pool of doubt and fear. If Mihashi could stay on the team, if even for a couple more days, he was going to do it. Not even Hatake could scare him enough. He was still following Hatake's rules…but he didn't have to let him or his team know the full truth just yet.

"Come on, let's go!" Abe called from his locker.

Anxiety started to pool in his stomach at the thought of standing, much less moving. He didn't want to have to show Abe that he was injured. He felt so weak and helpless. If he could have been a little stronger, maybe his injuries wouldn't be so bad.

Mihashi let his legs uncurl from the position he was sitting in, feeling his abdominal muscles groan and flare with pain at the movement. Standing up wasn't going to be easy. The scabs that were already starting to form on his forearms were itching under his school uniform and the large purple and yellow bruise that had formed on his shoulder throbbed. Mihashi glanced around for something to grab onto and help him stand up but there was nothing within reach.

Abe's cleats echoed on the locker room floor as he quickly approached Mihashi. "We don't have all day. Let me help you up."

Mihashi could only stare in fear as Abe grabbed for his hand and jerked him to his feet.

XxXxX

Mihashi was moving too slow for Abe's liking. He wanted to get him out on the field as soon as possible, have his teammates cheer him up as soon and possible, and then send him back to bed. The boy looked absolutely exhausted from his curled up position on the floor and knew the faster they got this over with the better.

Abe walked over to Mihashi, visibly startling him from his thoughts. "We don't have all day. Let me help you up."

Abe reached down and grabbed Mihashi's cold hand. As Abe pulled him to a standing position, Mihashi let out a wounded yelp and clutched his right arm protectively. Abe's breath caught in his throat at the sound and immediately let go. His eyes widened as Mihashi swayed unsteadily on his feet and a spotted bright red color started to stain the sleeve of his shirt. Mihashi let a sob escape his lips before slowly backing up until his back was against a locker and he was able to steady himself.

Abe knew injuries, himself obtaining countless ones in middle school alone. Abe knew the magically appearing red color on Mihashi's uniform was blood. That could only mean one thing.

Mihashi was injured. Abe felt his mind being thrown into a whirlwind of worry, hurt, guilt, and rage. He had caused Mihashi even more pain than he was already in….

"Mihashi…" Abe's voice was barely above a whisper. He walked on numb legs towards Mihashi, the color red screaming from the white background. He stopped in front of the trembling boy. "Let me see."

Tears once again began to fall down Mihashi's face as he tried to clutch his arm closer to his body.

"God dammit, Mihashi!" Abe's voice broke as emotions started to surface. "Show me your arm!"

After a few moments, Mihashi unclenched his injured arm and let Abe carefully take it. Abe slowly rolled up Mihashi's sleeves and looked at the raw and half-healing scratches that scattered his forearms. Some were bandaged and Abe wondered if the injuries underneath those were even worse. Were there even more injuries than just these? Abe felt his heart twist in guilt at the pain Mihashi must have experienced when he pulled him up from the floor.

"…Are there more?" Abe's voice returned to a soft whisper, not trusting himself at the moment to talk any louder than that.

Mihashi hesitated, feeling raw and vulnerable, but slowly pointed to his other forearm, stomach and shoulder. All the while, Mihashi didn't say anything. Tears continued to fall and his eyes remained connected with the floor.

Abe stood in disbelief. His heart and stomach sank at the thought of how much pain his pitcher was in and how much dedication or sheer stupidity he must have to still come to practice.

"I'm…I'm so sorry, Mihashi…" Abe apologized. "What happened? How did you get these injuries? Was it after practice? Why didn't you tell me earlier? Mihashi, you need to take care of yourself. You should have stayed in bed and rested. Why didn't you tell me? I would never have pulled you up like that…if I'd had known… Tell me what happened!"

Fear and irrationality gripped Abe's mind. Was Mihashi too injured to play? Would he ever recover from his? Was it permanent?

Their battery was finally starting to solidify since the beginning of the season. Mihashi was quickly earning his ace position. Abe depended on him; he needed him. Abe knew that a replacement pitcher would never be as skilled as Mihashi. The thought alone of having a replacement pitcher made his eye twitch involuntarily and his stomach churn in protest.

"_What could have happened to him?… Mihashi..._"

Chapter end


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: I realize it has been an ungodly amount of time since I have last updated. For that I'm sorry and I don't really have much of an excuse other than the fact that college is all consuming and science takes a toll on creative expression. However, this story has never been forgotten! It's my baby, after all. Now that summer is starting (and I'm graduating), I hope to update MUCH more frequently. Now on with Chapter 5. Please enjoy :)

Chapter Five

Mihashi stood frozen in place, Abe's questions and demands hanging in the air unanswered. Tremors in his legs caused his whole body to shake and a cold sweat to break out across his forehead. Abe had found out about the injuries.

"_H-he won't want me anymore_," Mihashi cringed, the dream of spending a couple more days with his team came to a shattering halt. How could he have been so stupid? So selfish? He was injured, broken…worthless. "_Without pitching, I-I mean n-nothing to them_." Tears continued to stream down his face, but he couldn't even conjure up the energy to wipe them away. This was the end.

"I-I-I-I'm s-s-sorry," Mihashi managed to squeeze out, ending the heavy silence that had settled over the room. He was starting to feel lightheaded, and the pain from his injuries pulsed through him with the beating of his heart.

"You idiot!" Abe shouted, shocking Mihashi enough to look up at the dark haired catcher. Although the young battery had only known each other for a couple of weeks, Mihashi could tell that Abe was furious. His teeth were clenched together, and his fists were shaking in undeniable rage. Mihashi reflexively cringed and shut his eyes when he saw Abe slowly raise his arm towards him.

"_I deserve w-whatever punishment_," Mihashi inwardly cried. Maybe Abe-kun wanted to break his arm as well…

But instead of the pain Mihashi was expecting, a warm, gentle weight settled on top of his head. The weight also seemed to be trembling, but Mihashi wasn't sure if that was from himself or Abe-kun.

"You're such an idiot," Abe whispered. Mihashi felt the hand on his head clench slightly. "You're hurt…you're hurt, and I couldn't even tell. I hurt you…"

Mihashi could only stare as tears welled up and threatened to fall from Abe's dark eyes, his pain momentarily forgotten.

"I'm so sorry, Mihashi," Abe dropped his gaze, his face stained red in frustration, guilt and rage. "I wasn't there to protect you."

What was Abe talking about? Mihashi was weak and deserved whatever punishment Hatake enforced for ruining their middle school team. He was a poison to the team, a slow, lousy pitcher who didn't win any games for his team in the past three years. Why was Abe even bothering with him?

"Y-y-you deserve a better… p-pitch-"

"I want you!" Abe yelled out, pushing down slightly on Mihashi's head. "I want to be your catcher! I want you to throw only to me! Why can't you get that through your thick skull?"

XxXxXxX

Emotions were running rampant through Abe. The urge to slowly tear the limbs off of the person who did this to his pitcher, who dared try to hurt their battery, was all consuming. This overwhelming rage continued to increase as Mihashi proceeded to point out all the hidden injuries, but at the same time his heart sank. Mihashi was hurt and although the obvious disregard for his personal health and well-being was infuriating, Abe was used to that. How many times did Abe have to remind the smaller freshman to take care of himself, to eat right, and to rehydrate during practices? The selfless attitude Mihashi held for the team was unrivaled, to the point of stupidity.

No, what Abe was most frustrated with was himself. The guilt of hurting Mihashi, however unintentional, made him feel sick to his stomach. The fact that he didn't even register that Mihashi was hurt was completely unacceptable. Although Abe couldn't read body language to the extent that Tajima could, his high attention for detail meant he could usually decipher Mihashi's awkward and annoying mannerisms. Unfortunately, his complete lack of patience was something he was still trying to improve upon.

"_But…Mihashi needed me…_" Abe's heart continued to sink. The sudden mood swing from rage to guilt and fear left his eyes stinging and his vision blur. "_…He needed me to figure it out, to help him. I'm the worst catcher…the worst friend_."

He didn't deserve Mihashi. Abe had worked so hard during the game against Mihoshi to try to prove to Mihashi that he belonged on team Nishiura. He wanted Mihashi to experience what it felt like to have a real catcher, to feel the rush of a strike out, and watch the bond between the pitcher and catcher grow. Abe wanted to continue playing with Mihashi, who was still more talented than they both knew. He wanted to be the one to make his confidence soar and to celebrate victories with.

A few weeks ago, Abe wouldn't have given the stuttering boy a second look. But now, through all the sweat and tears, the morning practices, and late night training, the small pitcher had grown to mean something more. There was so much more to discover, so much talent left unexplored. Why was Mihashi talking about leaving?

Abe's hand slid from Mihashi's head down to cup the back of the pitcher's neck. "Please…" Abe murmured, quickly wiping any tears at had escaped unnoticed and regaining his composure. "I know it's hard for you to understand…but stick with me. You're a great pitcher, Mihashi, and I know together we can beat any challenge that comes our way."

Abe glanced up at Mihashi, noticing the boy had stopped crying, but his face was frozen in shock. "_He kinda looks cute when he's not crying…_" Abe's body went ridged at the thought and stared at the small pitcher. Mihashi would always be lean, no matter how many rice balls and protein shakes Abe and Momoe would shove down his throat. The small stature wasn't sickly though. Mihashi was stronger than what he appeared. His soft, orange hair curled and fluffed up, especially on days when the humidity was high. Abe even noticed that the right side of his mouth would twitch into a smile when he thought none of his teammates were watching him. "_…Damn it_." Abe could feel his face heat up.

The back of Mihashi's neck also felt hot, and Abe noticed that some of Mihashi's scabs, which had split open on his arm, were still bleeding. Another jolt of guilt shot through him.

"Come on," Abe sighed, shaking the thoughts from his head and ignoring the fact that Mihashi hadn't responded to his request. At least the small pitcher was no longer stuttering about his need to leave the team. "Let me wrap your cuts properly so they don't get infected."

Mihashi still remained silent as Abe grabbed his hand and led him over to the bench to sit down before running to get the first aid kit. "_His hand is ice cold. Why does he always feel so nervous around me? Through all of our meditation sessions in morning practice, his hand never got warm. Will he ever feel comfortable around me?_"

"Take off your shirt so I can treat all of your injuries," Abe demanded, crouching down in front of Mihashi with the first aid kit.

Mihashi flinched slightly but after a moment's hesitation he attempted to unbutton his white button up shirt. After undoing the first button, Mihashi's hands began to shake and he winced in pain every time he had to move his arm. Abe could quickly see tears of frustration and shame form once again in the pitcher's eyes.

"Let me," Abe moved closer to Mihashi, gently pushing away the shaky hands and began undoing the remaining buttons. Abe tried desperately to ignore the intimate gesture of unclothing his teammate, but he couldn't help the blush that forming on his checks. "_He needs my help. We're teammates. I'm not unclothing him because I want to. Just how injured is he if he can't even unbutton his own clothes?_"

Abe's question was answered as he pushed back the shirt. An ugly, purple bruise stuck out from the surrounding pale white skin on Mihashi's shoulder. Splotches of angry yellows and greens littered the surrounding area, and Abe could only imagine this was why the pitcher had so much trouble moving his arm. A long white bandage was wrapped tightly around Mihashi's stomach but Abe could see the edges of a bruise from underneath. Random scratches and cuts were scattered around his torso as well as arms, which were now smeared with dried blood. Mihashi looked like he had just crawled from a car crash.

Anger once again swept through the catcher's mind.

"…Mihashi," Abe barely managed to breath out as adrenaline once again coursed through his veins. He had never imagined it was this bad. Abe didn't miss Mihashi flinch slightly away from him and the duck of his head as he tried desperately to avoid Abe's eyes.

"Who did this…Mihashi, who? You need to tell me who…goddamnit, who the FUCK did this? LOOK AT ME!"

Mihashi's eyes snapped up and locked with Abe's. He could tell by his flushed face and wet eyes that the small pitcher had begun to cry again. Mihashi's eyes were wide and full of emotion. Abe could shift through the sadness, pain, frustration, humiliation that swirled inside, but he also noticed an emotion deep in those eyes that made his heart drop. He saw fear.

"_Damn it_."

Abe quickly stood up and walked away from where Mihashi sat, his school shirt still opened revealing his battered body. Covering his eyes with the back of his hand, Abe sucked in deep breaths, trying to calm down. He didn't want to scare Mihashi. He had already hurt him enough. Abe quickly compressed the guilt that once again threatened to consume him and leaned against the metal lockers, letting the cold seep through his shirt and cool him down.

How could someone do this? Who hated Mihashi so much to inflict so much harm? It made Abe's blood boil.

Abe was snapped out of his vengeful thoughts by the sound of Mihashi's sobs. Quickly opening his eyes, he saw Mihashi's tense body shaking as fat tears continuously rolled down his cheeks, his face flushed. Abe's heart dropped at the sound, all feelings of hate and revenge washed away. He crouched down next to the anguished boy, unconsciously grabbing his hand and noticed that despite the fever Mihashi obviously had, his hand was still ice cold.

Mihashi didn't seem to notice.

"Hey, don't cry. I'm…I'm sorry if I scared you…just please don't cry anymore."

Mihashi's sobs still racked his body and showed no signs of slowing. Abe was only able to watch, his heart breaking as he witnessed the turmoil that was going on inside his pitcher.

Abe leaned forward and carefully placed his arms around the trembling boy, careful not to hit any of his injuries, and rested his head against Mihashi's. "Shh, it'll be ok. Please don't cry, Mihashi, it'll be ok. Deep breaths...come on…" Abe whispered into Mihashi's ear, not sure if he was trying to sooth the distraught pitcher or himself. Maybe it was both.

Mihashi's small, shaking body was on fire and Abe noticed his back was covered in sweat. He wasn't sure how long he sat there, with Mihashi in his arms, mumbling reassurances and calming words in his ear, trying desperately not to think of who caused the injuries in the first place. Slowly, Mihashi's cries diminished and the trembling in his body faded. At some point, Mihashi had lowered his head to rest in the crook of Abe's neck, his breathing was still horse but quieter and less raged as compared to before. Abe could feel that his own shirt was soaked from sweat and tears, but he couldn't bring himself to care. He reached down and once again grabbed one of Mihashi's small, calloused hands and smiled slightly to himself when he noticed the warmer temperature.

"_See Mihashi_," he leaned more into the embrace, tightening his hold on the smaller orange-haired boy. "_There's no reason to be nervous around me. I will be your support. You will never seem weak in my eyes… So please, trust me_."

Abe tried to ignore how his heart suddenly seemed too big for his chest as he held Mihashi, how right it felt to have his arms around the pitcher who for once seemed completely relaxed in Abe's presence.

Noticing Mihashi's breathing had decreased significantly, Abe quietly mumbled in Mihashi's ears, not wanting to startle the relaxed boy but not wanting him to fall asleep in the locker room either. A protective feeling that seemed to creep up from the back of Abe's mind didn't want the other teammates seeing Mihashi like this. He wanted this totally relaxed, trusting Mihashi all to himself.

"Hey Mihashi…you're going to fall asleep if we keep sitting like this. Come on, awake up."

Mihashi grumbled something nonsensical and attempted to sit up, but the muscles around his core seized up in protest. Gasping in pain, Mihashi clutched his stomach and keeled over as the taste of bile filled his mouth. A high-pitched whine escaped his lips.

Abe winced as he watched Mihashi ride out the residual waves of pain, suddenly feeling awkward when he realized he didn't know how to further comfort the boy.

"You ok?" Abe really wasn't expecting a response. He knew the answer anyway. "When was the last time you took pain medication? I'll try to find some," Abe started digging around the first aid kit, allowing Mihashi some space. "Have you eaten recently? No, of course you haven't." Mumbling to himself, Abe quickly glanced up and winced as he saw how frail and small Mihashi looked. He'd need to have Mihashi eat something before taking the aspirin.

Abe quickly unzipped his sports bag, spotting a granola bar that was tucked away underneath this pile of extra undershirts, and handed it to Mihashi. "Eat this."

Mihashi slowly glanced up from his tucked position, face pale white, and looked cautiously at the bar.

"Eat it. Now." Abe commanded. Mihashi ducked his head but reached out with shaky hands and grabbed the bar from Abe.

Satisfied, Abe turned away and starting counting out aspirin tablets. "Here, are you done eating? I want you to take these-" Abe noticed the bar still sat unopened in Mihashi's hand. "Mihashi! You need to eat!"

Mihashi shook his head, and Abe felt a spike of frustration jolt through him, his patience once again running dangerously thin. Snatching the snack back, Abe ripped the wrapper off. He realized he was panting, most likely in frustration both at the injured pitcher as well as his own helplessness. Taking a deep breath, Abe tried to calm down.

"Just…two bites," Abe sat down next to Mihashi, placing the bar back in his open hands. "You need to take medicine, but that requires you to eat something. I know you don't want to…but the medicine will make you feel better. So please…"

Abe felt like he was reasoning with a five year old, but his patience was rewarded as he watched Mihashi bring the snack up to his mouth and take a bite. Abe was unaware of the soft smile that formed on his lips.

Mihashi finished what he could and quickly swallowed the pills, his movements jerky and lethargic. Abe knew Mihashi was utterly exhausted, his body using all available energy in an effort to heal itself.

"_I have to get him home_," Abe thought as he carefully continued to remove Mihashi's school shirt, watching as goosebumps blossomed on his pale skin. Abe had never tried to be so gentle with another person before, except maybe besides his younger brother when he was a baby. It made his hands tremble slightly with effort.

Abe unwrapped the bandages that were starting to bleed through and gritted his teeth at the site. He moved quickly and efficiently, his mind solely focused on applying anti-bacterial medication and re-wrapping the injuries with new gauze in an effort to suppress the need to scream in anger. It just wasn't fair! Mihashi sat as still as possible but tremors either caused by the damp room or pain frequently shook his body.

Abe sighed when he was done, reaching in his bag and grabbing one of his spare shirts. "Your shirt has blood on it. Wear this one. Then I'm taking you home." Going back to practice was simply not an option anymore.

Mihashi didn't seem to think so.

"…B-but…Momoe…" Mihashi's voice was merely above a whisper but Abe heard it.

"Practice can wait, Mihashi. You are more important. You would never be able to make it home by yourself anyway…" Abe replied sharply. How could Mihashi possibly think he would abandon him now?

One arm at a time, Abe helped Mihashi slide the shirt over his injured body. Abe couldn't help but notice how loose the shirt fit around Mihashi's smaller body. "_He really should eat more_…"

Mihashi starred unblinking at Abe, not saying anything in response to Abe's statements. Abe smirked. "Come on, let's go home."

Abe started to stand up but a hand suddenly clenched the hem of his shirt, preventing him.

"D-don't…don't l-leave me…" Mihashi's face was flushed but there was a look of determination in his eyes.

Abe's smirk fell into a smile. He reached down and cupped the side of Mihashi's face, wiping away the residual tears that continued to leak out of his eyes.

"You're stuck with me, Mihashi. You're my pitcher, and I'm your catcher. Nothing will ever change that. I need you like you need me," Abe's voice cracked slightly, causing him to fall silent. "Let's go."

Chapter End.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Text signifying a flashback will be in "_italics_"

Thoughts within a flashback will be "**bolded and normal**"

I did things this way so it will hopefully be easier to read :) Enjoy the chapter!

XxXxXx

Chapter 6

Mihashi wasn't sure how long they had been walking. Time seemed to take on a surreal dimension where seconds were replaced by jolts of pain, beads of sweat that rolled down his face, and the number of times he stumbled over his own feet. He could feel his eyelids starting to close even though his legs were still in motion, his body moving robotically as his mind drifted.

It must have been early evening. The sun was starting to set, and although it was no longer beating down relentlessly, the humidity levels seemed to have risen dramatically since Mihashi had made his journey to school that morning. His movements felt slow and lethargic. Mihashi was exhausted. Although the pain medication that Abe had given him helped, his body still felt stiff and sore and his stomach churned.

Mihashi glanced slightly to his right and his gaze fell on two dark eyes that were watching him closely. Mihashi quickly looked down.

He heard Abe sigh loudly. "I'm still here."

Mihashi felt his face heat up in embarrassment. He had hoped that Abe was missing the little glances Mihashi kept giving the dark-haired catcher to make sure he was still there by his side… making sure it wasn't Hatake…

A shiver of fear crept down Mihashi's spine, making him suddenly feel cold in the hot, humid air. Mihashi quickly scanned the surrounding area, paranoia momentarily replacing fatigue. A cat was lounging underneath some bushes and a mother and daughter could be seen crossing the street up ahead. No Hatake. Mihashi gave a quiet sigh of relief, exhaustion consuming him once again. He glanced at Abe once again before he could stop himself.

"What are you doing?"

Abe had been watching him, his forehead scrunched together in frustration…or maybe it was concern. He didn't sound angry. It was more inquisitive than anything. Mihashi ducked his head again, breaking away from Abe's stare that always made Mihashi's tongue tie itself in knots and his stomach clench uncomfortably. Maybe if he looked away, Abe wouldn't expect an answer…

He heard Abe click his tongue in annoyance.

Over the past few weeks training with team Nishiura, Mihashi had started to feel more comfortable around his fellow teammates, especially those he also shared classes with. The overly friendly nature of Tajima always calmed Mihashi and Izumi and Hamada were always patient with him. But even though he spent most of his time practicing with Abe, he still found himself to be a stuttering, overly self-conscious mess when he tried to talk to him. It's like he couldn't articulate his thoughts clearly into words and it only ended up frustrating himself and Abe more.

Suddenly, out of the corner of his eye, Mihashi saw a flash of movement moving swiftly towards them, and he cried out weakly, quickly bringing his arms up to protect his face. His body was tense; eyes clenched shut as he waited for the blow to come. He knew that Hatake must have waiting for him. He must have known he wouldn't be able to quit the team or leave Abe. He knew how selfish Mihashi was, how he couldn't stand down.

Seconds ticked by. There was no yelling, no taunting words laced with venom. He wasn't suddenly pushed to the ground, where he knew he would be at the mercy of his attackers. Pain…it had hurt so much. Lying there on the cold ground, feeling his nerves scream as he was kicked and dragged.

But the pain never came. All Mihashi could hear was a quiet buzzing in his ears, a whisper of words that he couldn't quite make out. He gripped his hair in concentration, his body shaking as his mind once relived what had happened last night. Slowly, he started to make out the words.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry." His eyes snapped open when he realized those words were coming out of his mouth. He tried to stop the incessant mumbling of apologies that were spilling out but he couldn't. He body was reacting upon reflex and Mihashi grasped desperately for control.

Suddenly his vision was filled with the familiar sight of his catcher. He watched as Abe reached up and firmly grabbed his wrists, which were still perched above his head in a protective manner and slowly lowered them. It was only a brief moment before he felt the familiar embrace of Abe's arms around him. Just like in the locker room, Abe's arms were strong but gentle.

"Mihashi," Abe whispered painfully causing Mihashi to briefly wonder if he had been hurt. Had Hatake hurt him too? Mihashi didn't think he would ever be able to forgive himself it that happened.

He could feel Abe's body against his own. It was warm and comforting…it was safe. Something in Mihashi's head snapped and he took a deep, shuddering breath. "_Hatake's not here…" _Mihashi suddenly realized, wanting to cry out both in relief and embarrassment. "_I imagined it…Hatake's not here._"

"I'm here…so don't be scared, ok?" Abe whispered in Mihashi's ear, causing Mihashi to shiver slightly and his stomach to flip uncomfortably. Mihashi could tell Abe was trying to grasp for the right words, the right things to say. He could tell because it was what Mihashi did every time he himself talked to Abe.

"_What a great person Abe-kun is_."

The shifts in Mihashi's moods were getting worse and more extreme, leaving him feeling more drained than before.

"We're almost to your house. You need to eat more, check your bandages, take more medication, and then sleep. Don't come to school tomorrow. Or practice. I can't believe I even have to clarify that…but if you come to practice I will be very angry. Your body needs rest. Do you…understand that?"

Abe's deep voice caused him chest to rumble, causing Mihashi to smile ever so slightly. He nodded, knowing Abe would only say what was best for Mihashi's health. He would do those things if Abe asked him…even skip practice. The smile quickly disappeared.

"Alright it's getting late. Let's keep going."

And with that, the embrace ended and the young battery once again made their way slowly through the neighborhood in search of Mihashi's house.

XxXxX

"_Abe sure has been in there for a while…should I go check up on him and Mihashi_?" Hanai once again glanced towards the locker room where not long ago he had walked in on Abe and Mihashi in a serious conversation. Could he even call it that? Mihashi had looked horrible. "_Did Abe say something to him? Is there something wrong? Is he sick?_"

Hanai picked a stray ball that rolled in front of him and threw it back to Sakaeguchi, who was smiling and waving in his direction. Even though the temperature had risen due to the increasing humidity, the team was staying hydrated and was still in good spirits. However, without having their ace practicing with them in the field, everyone could tell the team atmosphere was off.

Hanai looked back to the locker room building, almost willing Mihashi and Abe to come spilling out, ready to practice. Hanai gritted his teeth in frustration. "_This is so stupid…I'm the team captain, I should go check up on them and make sure everything's alright."_

With a nod in resolute, Hanai started to stalk off but was interrupted by a loud yell.

"HAAAANNNNNAIIIII!"

Hanai turned back towards the field, eyes twitching in irritation at being interrupted. He groaned as Tajima came running up towards him, grinning as obnoxiously as always.

"Whatcha doin?" Tajima smiled innocently as he came to a stop but there was an all-knowing gleam in his eye that made Hanai shift uncomfortably.

Clearing his throat and regaining his composure, Hanai brushed off his uniform. "My captainly duities."

Tajima tilted his head slightly, looking inquisitive before smirking. "You think too much, Mr. Captain."

"Huh? Tajima, you don't even know what you're talking about," Hanai sputtered. Tajima's uncanny ability to read his thoughts and body language was horribly annoying, slightly creepy…and frankly, incredibly sexy.

"You shouldn't worry about them so much. You should trust Abe to take care of his pitcher," Tajima winked, but Hanai could see the usual gleam in his eyes dim slightly.

"You know I don't trust Abe to control his temper around Mihashi! Those two fight all the time…wait no, Abe yells and Mihashi cries. What kind of battery is that! And from the looks of it, you don't fully trust Abe either," Hanai accused, pointing a finger in Tajima's direction.

"Hmmm…" Tajima mood shifted. He gazed at the locker room as if trying to read a new pitcher or figure out an unfamiliar breaking ball. It was cold and calculating. Hanai felt shivers run down his spine. "It's not that. It's not Abe…it's Mihashi. There's something wrong…He was acting weird in class and wouldn't open up to me."

"There always seems to be something wrong with that kid."

"Hanai! I'm being serious!" Hanai knew he was. He knew Tajima would never act like this if Mihashi were just having a minor dilemma. Both Hanai and Tajima were nervous. What was wrong? Would Mihashi be ok? They needed their pitcher.

A small, calloused hand suddenly linked with his own.

"Tajima!" Hanai gasped and quickly looked around to see if anyone was watching them. Noticing the rest of the Nishura team was on the other side of the field, he gave a small sigh and swung around to Tajima.

"What are you doing?" Hanai hissed. "We can't…we can't do this during practice." Hanai glared accusingly at Tajima, who only continued grinning like an idiot. The previous heavy atmosphere was immediately forgotten.

"Yes, sir, Captain, sir!" Tajima gave his hand a small squeeze before swinging up and saluting him. "…But it looked like you needed it. I told you don't worry about it. Any problems Mihashi has, the rest of the team has his back!"

Hanai grinned. Tajima was right.

"Alright, alright. Now get over there with the rest of team and practice!" Hanai ordered, not quite wiping the smile off his face. Around Tajima, Hanai found that was a very difficult thing to do.

With one last goofy smile, he watched as their replacement catcher ran back to the rest of their teammates, who were currently practicing returning grounders to first base. The young baseball prodigy instantly started laughing with Oki and Izumi, joining their conversation easily. Hanai felt a pang of jealously that he quickly tried to cover up. He knew Tajima was eccentric and highly social. It was part of the reason why he was attracted to the smaller player in the first place. But a small part of him wanted Tajima to only laugh with him, to only smile when Hanai was there. He knew the thought was completely irrational, but he couldn't stop it from spreading.

Hanai couldn't quite classify what was going on between himself and Tajima. It was confusing, undefined, and most of all, it made Hanai's head hurt. He knew how he felt about the third-baseman. Ever since the first time he saw Tajima swing a bat for the first time and watched his body move so gracefully and naturally with the timing of the ball, he knew that Tajima was someone very special.

But how did Tajima really feel about him? Thinking back a week ago, Hanai recalled when Tajima had confronted him after practice…

-flashback-

"_Hey, hey, Hanai!" Tajima called out as Hanai finished packing up his sports bag. "Where are you heading?"_

"_Huh? Tajima, it's almost 9 o'clock! I'm going home," Hanai snipped back. "_**Seriously, where else would I be going**_**?**__" It had been a long practice, and the team had finished with their cleanup and cool down later than usual. Hanai was hungry, sore, and had a pile of homework waiting for him when he got home. Not to mention he felt disgusting. He wasn't sure if he was in the mood to deal with Tajima's overly enthusiastic mood at the moment…_

"_Oh, good. Can I walk with you then?" Tajima grinned widely, and Hanai could tell that no matter what he said, Tajima was going to tag along either way._

_Hanai sighed. "Whatever."_

"_Ok!" Tajima's face seemed to beam in excitement, and his usual empty-headed grin mellowed into a soft smile. "I'll be right back so don't leave without me!" He said quickly, turning to run and tell Mihashi goodbye._

_Hanai felt a lump form in his throat and could feel his face heat up. He had never seen Tajima smile so sincerely before. "_**What would make him…smile like that?"**

_After some quick goodbyes, Hanai and Tajima started the trek home. The beginning of their journey was quiet, which gave Hanai a brief moment to relax and collect his thoughts. It was a comfortable silence, muted by the fog that could be seen rolling in the distance and the quiet calls of the cicadas. _

"_Team Nishiura is really great, isn't it?" Tajima exclaimed suddenly, the lighthearted grin back on his face. _

_Hanai couldn't help but smile back. "Yeah, we're turning into quite the team. I can't wait until the summer tournament starts."_

_Tajima nodded. "Everyone on the team is so great! Each person is learning so much, and I can tell we're really growing together."_

_Hanai agreed. "_**I hope you know you're the best…We wouldn't be so great without you."**

"_I really like everyone! And Shinooka and Momoe and even Shiga, although he can be a little weird sometimes…and I don't really understand what he's talking about when he starts talking about the brain…" Tajima looked up at the sky in concentration, as if recalling when Shiga tried to explain how hormones and neuroreceptors worked._

"_But you're my favorite, Hanai…"_

_Hanai turned to look at Tajima in disbelief, but Tajima was still staring up into the night sky, avoiding Hanai's gaze. "_**Don't read into it.**" _Hanai thought suddenly. "_**This is Tajima. He's always spurting off about how he loves everyone. So don't think it's more than it actually is.**_"_

_Hanai cringed. "Yeah, ok Tajima. That's great." _

_Why did he feel like he wanted to cry?_

_Tajima stopped suddenly and grabbed Hanai's arm, swiftly turning him so they were starring eye to eye._

"_I really like you, ok?" Tajima said loudly, before an unfamiliar blush spread across his cheeks. But Tajima didn't look away. He continued starring at Hanai, even though he looked exceedingly uncomfortable. He appeared determined, as if trying to portray an emotion that Hanai couldn't quite grasp._

_It was Hanai that broke the gaze first. The place where Tajima was grabbing his arm burned._

_What was Tajima even saying? Tajima liked him? Did he even __**realize**__ what he was saying? "_**Does he mean as a teammate? As a friend? As a captain?**_" Hanai groped his mind for an explanation, a logical reason as to why Tajima would suddenly confess this to him._

"_Tajima…I don't understand…" Hanai felt torn, words escaping his mouth in a mere whisper. He wanted to hope, to believe in what Tajima was telling him but he couldn't. "_**Doesn't he realize how much I like him? Admire him? How much it would hurt if his feelings weren't the same as mine?**_"_

_Suddenly, soft lips covered his own. For a moment, time stood still. All feelings of insecurity and unease washed away with the simple touch of Tajima's lips on his. Hanai felt his heart beating wildly in his chest, and a sudden euphoric feeling overwhelmed him. However, as suddenly as the kiss had started, it ended, leaving Hanai gasping. He briefly wondered if he had imagined it all. _

_He watched as Tajima slowly stepped back, eyes still resolute but a smile lingering on his lips. Hanai held his breath._

"_Do you understand now?"_

-end of flashback-

Hanai touched his lips lightly, feeling his cheeks heat up as he tried to remember the feel of those lips on his. Did he understand?

It seemed simple enough. Tajima had confessed his feelings to Hanai, but there was still the fact that this was _Tajima_. Hanai had started taking any random outbursts that Tajima conducted with a grain of salt since they were often useless and not thought through in the least. Plus, Tajima was always going on about masturbating, porn, and women with big chests with the rest of their teammates…

Was the love that Tajima felt towards him simply platonic? The result of a backup battery team being formed? Was Tajima just confused?

The days that followed Tajima's confession were as normal as they could've possibly been with Team Nishiura. Conversations between himself and Tajima remained focused on the team, possible plays and various new workout plans to try to get an edge up on the summer competition. Neither mentioned the kiss. Nothing had changed.

But Tajima had started to act more physical around him. Slinging an arm around his neck whenever he got the chance, patting him on the back or trying to hold his hand when he thought no one was looking. Every time Hanai could feel his heart soar and his body tingle. These feelings consumed him, until he thought he might burst.

The screech of a loud whistle jostled Hanai out of his thoughts.

"Alright, take it in guys! Remember, morning practice is at 6:30 tomorrow morning," Momoe's announcement was met by groans, but Hanai could see the smiles on everyone's faces. They loved being here, practicing with the team, feeling themselves get stronger and faster every day.

Hanai held his breath as everyone started walking towards the locker room. Were Abe and Mihashi still in there? But conversations were unperturbed as people entered the locker room. There were no sudden outbursts and awkward silences upon entering the building, so Hanai assumed that Mihashi and Abe must have left some time during practice. Hanai felt a tinge of annoyance. Abe could have at least told him that they were leaving. It would have saved him a lot of worrying during practice. He'd complain to him tomorrow.

Hanai stayed behind, having to talk with Momoe first before he could leave. Although their debriefing was short, by the time he entered the locker room, there were only a few people still left.

Hanai sighed and sat down to start untying his muddy shoes. He'd probably have to clean them later that night. By the time he finished changing and packing up, he turned and noticed that the only ones who remained were himself and Tajima. Tajima was sitting in front of his locker, fiddling with something from his book bag, facing away from Hanai.

Suddenly, all the feelings of that night came rushing back. Love, admiration, jealousy, insecurity, and doubt blended together and crashed through him in waves. His heart clenched painfully. How could this small player cause so much turmoil and confusion? Hanai needed something to settle these conflicting thoughts, to calm his mind. He had never felt so vulnerable in his life.

Hands shaking from adrenaline, Hanai quickly covered the distance separating him from Tajima and grabbed the boy's shoulder roughly.

"Ow! Hanai what are you-?"

Hanai ignored his outcry. Hanai needed...something. But what was it? Hanai felt confusion and hurt gripping his lungs tightly, not allowing him to breath. The emotions continued welling up inside of him.

Tajima just stared up with shocked wide eyes.

"_I need to know it's not all in my head._" Hanai realized suddenly. "_That what he's feeling is as real as what I'm feeling."_

Without thinking, Hanai leaned down and pressed his lips against Tajima's. It was sloppy and rushed but Hanai had never felt anything so right in his life. Tajima's soft lips seemed to form to Hanai's perfectly. He needed this, craved this contact that only he had with the small catcher.

He could feel his blood pumping, his heart racing as he broke the kiss. His body was on fire. "Tajima…I…"

Without warning, his back was pushed up against a row of lockers, his shoulders pinned back against the cold metal, causing him to shudder. Tajima leaned his body against Hanai's.

"I told you already you think too much, Hanai." Tajima's breath was hot against his face.

Tajima leaned in slowly and captured Hanai's lips. This time, there was no urgency. It was slow and intense, as if Tajima knew Hanai needed this in order to erase all doubt. Hanai found himself relaxing into the kiss, enjoying the sensation of being pinned against the lockers behind him, noting that Tajima was clearly stronger than he looked. He groaned as Tajima started to nibble at his bottom lip, asking for entrance. Hanai parted his lips while wrapping his arms around the smaller boy. When Hanai felt Tajima slip his tongue inside, he groaned involuntarily.

Suddenly, he found himself kissing Tajima back, their tongues fighting for dominance. There was a thrill of excitement as the competition for control between the two teammates gained momentum. Arousal started to pool within Hanai causing a new desire to overwhelm him.

Tajima broke the kiss and the two stood there panting, both of their faces flushed. The small catcher leaned his forehead against Hanai's shoulder, taking deep shuddering breaths in an effort to cool himself down. Hanai could barely think. Energy pumped through his body rejuvenating him.

"I really like you," Hanai blurted out before he could stop himself. He felt his face heat up as he quickly brought one hand to cover his mouth, effectively silencing any other equally embarrassing confessions that happened to form.

Amused, Tajima looked up at the flustered pitcher and laughed. He leaned up and gave a small kiss to the hand that covered his mouth.

"I know," Tajima smiled and Hanai felt his heart flutter. "Come on, let's go home."

Tajima grabbed the hand that Hanai let fall from his face and together they walked into the night.

.

End of Chapter.

A/N: SO. MANY. FEELS! Hope you guys enjoyed this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it!

Also thanks to everyone who reviewed! You guys fill my heart with warmth and motivate me to keep writing. So THANK YOU! Seriously, you guys are the best! Also, I just got a tumblr account! The link is in my profile so check it out!


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